I was watching some videos online of people hanging themselves, and it seems like a long painful death more violant than I thought.
I thought it were to be more peaceful and quicker.
It doesn’t look painless at all.
I still feel like I’m going to have to do it though.
I’m really scared, but I think the time will come when my anguish will be greater than my fear.
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You know, even as a young, inexperienced teen, I was always just abruptly against the idea of hanging myself. I just sensed it would be this torturous event. I always was opposed to hanging and had never even thought of hanging until recent as a last resort depending on how easy it is to access the materials needed. I was surprised when I found how common it is for people to chose hanging as their preliminary method for suicide.
I still think it’s better than jumping off a cliff or drowning. Better than being hit by a train.
But I could be wrong.
I um wouldn’t know….. honestly
I know that when worst comes to worst you have to chose one…..
Um….. they make it difficult if only you can get an easy way.
I hear charcoal is peaceful which I am only discussing because in the legal ordinances, the peaceful pills handbook is lawful and I mean if they’re gonna do it at least educate them on to go peacefully……
I…uh feel I am being watched so I….. um probably couldn’t get charcoal without being arrested for the…. 10th or so time……..
Is there anyone else they can watch so close as me?
Leaves me to use a more less peaceful way whichever is easiest for me at the time…….
I have overdosed but it didn’t work out
I vowed to be dead by 6 years ago…. yada yada kept alive because of horsesh*t people I’ve hated since my childhood
I hear having a conscience is a sin of course.
I guess they don’t believe in free will?
However they want it though, torture an innocent so they can have it their way.
its a pretty torturous way to die, getting hit by a car or a train seems more appealing.