Stopped talking to people around me , I constantly seek to them to help me but they don’t understand the way I feel . I will not burden them any further . It’s hard to watch others concern over something they can’t control . They will understand . I feel like they’re just waiting for the day . So am I . I don’t have the courage . Every day gets harder and harder to live through . Problems arise faster than others can be solved . I don’t trust anyone and I can’t rely on myself .. I am stuck in a puzzle that I don’t want to solve .
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I feel the same way you do, except my problems are unresolvable.
Well at least they feel unresolvable, to me.
It feels like resolutions always lead to more pain .
Yeah one trouble I’m dealing with right now is that even if everything goes good, we will still eventually experience earth shattering pain. I rather just end it rather than struggling through all that.
What makes you feel suicidal cgi?
I don’t find any part of myself worthy . I can’t envision any sort of future for myself , self-esteem set sail long ago . Communication with humans is like communication with aliens , not happening ; Have never been able to communicate how I really feel , like something is holding the words from my mouth , It’s even harder because others have more difficult situations to deal with .. I just always feel out of place .. Everywhere I go … Everyone is always staring at me in public like I don’t belong , makes me think I definitely don’t . I can feel the shell of my existance growing weaker and weaker the more that builds up inside . Reoccurring nightmares keep me up for days , sick of waking up screaming and crying … Every day feels like a shitty day . All mental pain , I smoke physical pain away .
I understand how you feel, because I feel a lot the same way, especially lately.
It’s difficult for me to go into detail, right now why I’m suicidal right now, I’m feeling mentally depleated.
Sorry for my late response, I was talking to some one I knew.
hello
I think I know what you say ,that feeling that you don’t belong like that when you are near others and they can’t understand even one of your words or you just can’t relate with what they talk about their whole problems seem so strange and unfamiliar and you start feeling that why I should tell them anything anymore or what should I say anyway , maybe I’m just bothering them with my existance .you know though I know that I can’t help you in actual world , maybe even I won’t be able to really understand you completely but I have had same feelings and I still many times feel that kind of feelings lots of times but only thing that makes me feel better is that I’m not the only one who is like this ,here I find people who think like me and feel like me and I care about them as I know how it feels when you have nobody who understands you .I really hope that you overcome your problems ,I realllly wish that even if you need a miracle to feel better that miracle happens to you as soon as possible and I belive you will find your answers if you try hard someday 🙂
Thanks for the comments . I only have one person in my real world that understands , so its comforting to know I share the same feelings with other people .