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There’s not much for me to say. Alright that’s a lie but there’s not much to say that’s important, and won’t sound like I’m running on and on about the same worthless crap. I don’t see myself becoming anything more than what I am currently: a good for nothing, parasitic lazy airhead. I’ve boosted myself in terms of motivation time and again, but the thrusters always burn out. I’m 19, in the middle of an open field accompanied with 0 direction. I don’t know what or how to do anything. I’ve been sleeping a lot lately, which is a trend I adopted before I was kicked out of my home. The longer I go on about nothing via this post, the more I realize something: everything is temporary. Life may be temporary, but so is this bullshit feeling that’s come over me, and over some of the fellow people on this site (I’ve been reading for 6 hours before I finally decided to join). I live vicariously through other people. I’m always interested in patching up someone else, when I could use double the bandaging. It’s time. I really want to do something, anything, but I don’t know what, when, where, or how. (ugh, this sounds so stupid and jumbled(it’s even better in real life), but bear with me.) Conflicting thoughts swirling all around. “Do something!” “Waste away, it doesn’t matter.” i just lost someone i loved because of stagnation, because I didn’t act; consequently, these waters are more placid than ever. sucks but there’s more people out there, as are job opportunities! College is the kicker though. Maybe I’ll figure that out soon. I would love to seek professional help (for ulterior motives ultimately, but still) because man. I am s a d. Lol. plus it’d afford me the chance to see inside a place I’d love to work in! I’m dreading heading to work, but you know, things have to be done (which SUCKS, but still.).

You know, if you read that, and understood it, you can do anything. So do it! I’ll try with you!