I’m 19 years old, I’ve already gone completely bald and people constantly confuse me for being in my early 30’s. I have about 2 friends left cause everyone else has crossed me or just simply moved on and it’s not like it’s easy to make new friends with people your age when you look old enough to be their dad. I’ve never had a girlfriend before, which is pretty understandable cause I’m overweight and just generally ugly as sin, and every chance I ever did have was quickly swiped by my man whore of a brother who would use them for a short while then get rid of them when he got bored. I also simply just don’t have any aspirations because I just can’t seem to care, I was raised from just a small child that I don’t matter and I’m a piece of crap, it’s to the point where the only thing that will really cheer me up is a bit of lsd. But overall I’m just so alone and I’m just so tired of being so alone and I also don’t see things changing anytime soon, and I can’t tell you how tired I am of the “oh if you got out more you’d feel a lot better” or the quintessential “there’s somebody for everyone”, but hell maybe there is but I’m just so tired of waiting, it’s been years of this crap. Heartbreak after heartbreak after heartbreak, and the best part of that is that I know it’s not their fault, it’s mine for even getting attached when there’s nothing there anyway, and I really do mean nothing. It also doesn’t help that I’m just so goddamn weird, I do not fit in at all. If actual pieces of human trash are happy and are surrounded by people that care about them, then wouldn’t that mean there’s something wrong with me? And it’s not even like I can talk about it to anyone really, on paper my life isn’t so bad, and I’m painfully aware of it and it just makes it that much worse because I don’t know why I wanna die so bad, it’s not like I can just fix the thing that’s making me sad. I’m just so tired of all this and I can feel that the end is near, but I’ll probably just wuss out of it at the last second because I know I’d hurt people with my absence. I just don’t know what to do anymore. Sorry for my crappy post and wasting the time of the people that read it.
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3 comments
Well, you’re still young af. I didn’t lose my virginity until 21 and it was to an escort. My first real relationship was 23.
That being said, it’s also possible you will never find someone. I’m familiar with the eternally lonely. Those who have never had a relationship or an opportunity to share intimacy with another person and are now in their 50s, 60s, etc.
I don’t have a crystal ball, I don’t know what will happen for you. But, for whatever it is worth, sex, intimacy, relationships, and whatever are a better fantasy than reality.
It’s not about sex for me, I’ve had sex with two girls and it was just sex, no love, no passion and it was honestly boring as hell. I want someone to love (as cliche as that sounds). But I do know that relationships are usually more trouble than they’re worth but still, it’s one of the last things I haven’t tried to break out of this low I’ve been in for so long, and I’m not really sure if it’ll even do the trick.
If you have more fat than what you want then start going to the gym and change your diet. I think bald and muscly men are a good combo (I’m male though but still it’s kinda cool man). Also I think girls like older men so if you look older you may be able to find a girl your age 😛
So train hard and watch “One punch man” (Saitama the super strong dude is bald too and all who have watched it will agree that he is cool in his own way. P.S: He is funny too.).
As for the love part, you will find the girl you are looking if you go and search where there are not many girls. Cause the kind of girl you are looking for is kind of rare (Don’t go catch em all!).