24/05/14

You made me feel alive,
You made me feel like a person,
I took that for granted and ended up ruining the most happiest moments of my life.

I wasn’t ready for you and you weren’t ready for me.

I couldn’t handle anything, everything upset me, I was a broken mess right from the start, I did and said so many wrong things, I ended up hurting someone I truly loved.

You simply couldn’t handle or deal with me and eventually you had enough.

I do not blame you anymore, I know I used to do that all the time.

Only because I genuinely believed it because I was completely blind to my wrongs.

Years of self reflecting, I still haven’t really let go.

I reached out my hand earlier, and broke into tears when I realised yours would never reach back.

You gave me life in so many different ways,
And for a long time I believed you took it away too.

But now I see that I was taking it away from myself, because I was simply afraid.

There are holes that will never be filled, but that doesn’t mean I can’t build bridges over them.

Memories that can’t be erased but that doesn’t mean I can’t move on from them.

A name, that will mean the world to me all the way to the grave.

All I really hope for, is that you’re doing okay.

And you will never see this,
But I know now that’s okay.