My boyfriend told me he was thinking about suicide for quite some time after his wife cheated, divorce, being in debt. He’s told me doesnt think too much about (our) future and he’s at the stage where he just wants to take each day as it comes and not stress..
he’s turned his life around and he seems happy and content. Im happy for him..
But im not. Im utterly depressed and secretly wanting to die. I secretly hate his new life. Nothing horrible has happeend to me im just fucked im the head. My self esteem is rock bottem. I hate myself all the time. Its like the ‘more happier’ he gets with his new friends and his new life.. the more and more miserable i get and the more the resentment builds. Im convinced he doesnt love me and he wants to cheat on me with his new friends who are better than me.
Its like our love grew because we could relate to each others depression haha gawd. And now im feeling insecure.
Now i think im fucked up and hes going to end it as i get more psycho.
It was easy for him.. he has guns!! I would need to do something crazy like jump off a bridge. What are other nice ways of killing yourself. Could you just ingest some kind of poisoneous substance which conveniently doesnt cause you any pain and you just fall asleep? Haha
3 comments
Nothing painless that I know of but if you find one let me know lol. Im sorry you’re going through all of that. It seems the more insecure we get the more people push away.
I hope things get better for you.
I feel guilty af to tell you this but a 10 years old could order lethal dose of heroin from darkweb and from what I have red the death is pretty much painless, your body just gets so relaxed your hearth stops beating. I will probably kill myself one day and I belive that every human should have the right to leave this world without unecessary pain. Please consider staying here tho, for your loved ones or potential people that could become ur loved ones. A lot of times people go for suicide even if their problems are actually temporary and with a lot of hard work they could recover and have a better life. Wish you best
Tell him.