Failed, again.

  July 10th, 2018 by morado123

Having lived in this stressful environment for some time, one would guess that I would become immune to pressure. Yet, today I see that I have not even a single thing I succeeded in doing. My girlfriend, well, I broke up with her, and I don’t even have a single friend that I really feel comfortable with. My whole relationship with everyone is really ruined. Also, school and work were never a thing for me. I tried extra hard for this last project, which miserably failed. Despite my best efforts, nothing, NOTHING, ever went well.

It’s rather stupid to think about suicide when the stress I feel is quite applied to everyone. But.. I still feel like jumping off my apartment. I still feel like smashing everything. Why should I live when happiness – which everyone says is the goal of your life – doesn’t exist in my life? I’ve never been happy. In fact, when I was 10 years old, I actually told my friend I would die in less than 20 years. From such young age, I…was depressed.

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