I’ve long since realized that, instead of being a token to my surviving in harsh times, my cutting scars are a constant reminder of how weak I had been. I’d been so weak that I couldn’t even visit a shrink. I was so afraid that I would have so many scars that I only cut a specific spot on my arm, to minimize the scars. See, I was weak all the time. Cutting, no matter how much comfort it gave me, was never a solution to anything. It was making me weaker.
But I stopped cutting and I’m in need of a new comfort. Something that won’t make me weak. Something that will actually make me stronger.
I guess a friend would do it, except for the fact that I don’t have any friend to whom I can tell my inner thoughts. Family is a burden to me, they won’t be much of a comfort.
Drawing, playing the viola.. nothing works. Everything I try in order to cheer myself up never works. Also, I don’t think choking myself counts as a comfort.
What should I do? I want to get out of this shit hell in my head. I’m trying, but I can’t.
2 comments
If you want to talk to someone you can talk to me. It’s easier to tell things to people online and it might be comforting
I’m just here waiting for an good answer so I can use it too 0_0