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I wish everyone would love me…

by WanderingDreamer91

I wish everyone would love me so I wouldn’t havw to be hurt anymore…

 

Their wouldn’t be any misunderstandings, or disagreements, or avoidance, or hatred and so on…

 

People would understsnd me and love.me forever…

 

I… what was it agsin that some people said in my last post about a girlfriend?

 

I should wsit for the girl to come to.me? How? Why? This isn’t Welcome to the NHK, there is no Misaki, I’m trying to be realistic.

 

How am I going to find people atrracted to.me just by natural persona? Or shoukd I some friendship into something more eith a girl I find?

 

Well how do you find and make friends…?

 

I mean I’d tske time for us to know rach other but we’d also know ehat we want from each other, we’d be lovers, or at least friends, and we’d know what we like or something…

 

Does anyone here even know what it’s like to have no friends and be lonely all tje time and a virgin, an incel?

 

That’s me, you know? Okay? I got nothing and I want to fill the void in my heart, my soul, with someone to actuallt love me and tell me I’m interesting snd not boring or a piece of shit and so on.

 

I’m so freaking tired of this, I just want to make the world mine…

 

I want to die… or have everything die… everytbing dies…

 

I don’t know what I want damn it… why can’t people just believe in me, they make it so freaking difficukt when I have things planned out and then I lose all my freaking motivation…

 

…….. Ugh.

 

I was going to post other stuff maybe but what’s the point, these two stupid posts is all I got today…

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10 comments

spectralgiraffe 8/2/2018 - 10:06 pm

lol I’m just gonna say, if I were a guy, I’d be single too. Probably forever alone. girls have it too easy, they can find a guy very easily.

freeroma 8/3/2018 - 12:24 am

If the girls are with a guy then it’s obviously a mutual effort… Not easy on either side to find a proper match.

WanderingDreamer91 8/3/2018 - 8:08 am

So girls can find guys and guys can find girls?

And so you’re a girl that can find a guy really easy?

And what do you mean by lol?

Are you messing with me…?

Jay from US 8/2/2018 - 10:19 pm

I like this. You’re doing your best to convey your thoughts. It’s especially not easy when you feel that there’s a layer to your own thoughts that you’re not addressing. The thing inside the thing.

Wouldn’t it be nice if the world was kind by default? People would only greet you with a warm smile and pat your back and say:

“Hey, I’m here, buddy. Do you need to talk about anything?”

And wouldn’t it be nice if the world knew the hurt we felt and everything stopped until they addressed you and your worries and fears?

If everything you said was, like…meaningful to someone’s ears. Like, they couldn’t wait to hear your random thoughts.

It seems easy enough. I only know you as a commenter, but your way of thinking is interesting. You’re… justifiably self-absorbed. All you want is the world to treat you with some… love. More smiles, more nods, more understanding, and more laughs with you.

AgentQ 8/2/2018 - 10:37 pm

That’d be nice. We have to earn love though. If it’s free it’s meaningless.

freeroma 8/3/2018 - 12:53 am

The existence of love does not take away hurt, misunderstanding, disagreements or any other negative emotion. An SO won’t love everything you say or do, vice versa. It’s ok.
Far as the attraction goes.. usually people meet at places of common interest. Bars, clubs, work .. you could try the dating site thing since right off both parties have a goal.
Honestly, given the state you’re in I think a friendship or two will suit you better first.. Yes i know what it’s like to not have friends, or a prospect at an SO. and yes it is rough. But I think you might even unintentionally put a lot of expectation on another.. one person can’t fill a void like that. They can help, but yeah. Loneliness is curbed with companionship, true. But from what you wrote if anything goes wrong.. when you pin so much on something you might find yourself spiraling more.
Making friends.. you start talking. You like game stuff, anime. There’s niches for that.. No one can talk about everything with everyone, you start the places you relate in whatever way is accessible and a lot is luck. My friends are from school, work and this place. That’s all I know.

This post kinda reminds me of “it’s a good life” from the twilight zone..

My 2 cents. Not meant in a bad way.

freeroma 8/3/2018 - 1:47 am

Wow. They did a season revamp of the twilight zone. . In color and everything.
Not really related to the post but damn. I loved Passage for Trumpet..

WanderingDreamer91 8/3/2018 - 8:16 am

Thanks everyone for being understanding…

… One time I said this on facebook some lady just laughed and thought it was funny, someone named Danielle Bohmir from this Indigo Children thing which I found interesting at the time.

Maybe it’s a bit possessive and creepy but I really am just lonely and want to feel loved and… I was being serious though despite all of that…

She thought it was a joke or just funny for some reason, I don’t know.

I told her I was hurt by that but she still didn’t get it!

Some people just can’t be reasoned with…

That’s why I wish… I don’t know… could do something more or gst away from it all…

What am I supposed, just ignore all of this and keep hearing that kind of crap? To hell with that, I want to slap her.

Earth 8/3/2018 - 9:45 am

Ok so you might find this something other than criticism, but it’s just criticism, don’t overdramatize it to something that it’s not.

I read most of your posts, some of your anime posts are fairly interesting, clearly you have those interests and so on, but the one about your mom was just cringe-worthy. Hopefully you take a deep breath, chill, and realize it yourself. You hate your mom because she told you reality is not the way you want it and you can’t accept that, despite the fact she hasn’t created this “reality”. Which makes it feel like you’re manipulative and can’t accept facts. What kind of girl would want that? She’d be afraid to even have opinions that you disagree with, even if she’s right and you’re wrong.

Anyway, the point is that you’re way too obsessed over getting a girlfriend, to the point that you don’t care about anything else. Clearly you have some interesting interests, so focus on them. When people said to let a girlfriend “come to you” they mean that you should focus on stuff that you like, interests, hobbies, and so on. Then, you might find a girlfriend interested in that part of you or whatever else defines yourself. In other words, get some activity that can define you.

I mean what do you expect to show off to a girlfriend seriously? Any guy will claim that he’s a good boyfriend, that he’ll love her unconditionally, and so on. Nothing would make you special for any girl in this regard. So basically, get a life, do something with it, and think of getting a girlfriend as a side effect rather than a goal. And stop blaming your mom. She’s being a very good mother trying to tell you how life is in reality, you’re not a child anymore, so take it properly like a grown up man.

You said you want to have a girlfriend with shared interests. Ok, so do those interests and find her that way. Being desperate like this is clearly not your interest: you’re not going to find any girl wanting you this way. Unless you think she’ll take pity on you or something. Incels are NOT right, girls and women are not objects that they deserve to have. Stop this mentality or calling yourself incel or thinking you are one.

I know you’ll take this the wrong way and I’m probably not going to bother you anymore, so just take a deep breath and read this with a clear mind instead of the desperation you put out. Since you like anime, you’re really acting like a yandere in a way, thinking that girls “belong to you”, I’m sure you’ll relate to this. They don’t, they’re human beings, just like you. There may be plenty of fish in the sea, but they want a fish special to them, so make yourself special, find a hobby or goal or whatever.

HollowBoi 8/4/2018 - 8:35 am

Mhmm, you really seem desperate for love huh? I mean i’ve been single as far as i can remember and im also a virgin (nothing to be ashamed of), but i never really thoroughly thought about getting a girlfriend that hard.

You shouldn’t bite more than you could chew, relationships aren’t simple, girls emotions are very complex you need to be flexible since they can get irrational at times, of course you’ll also need to be able to afford to give her gifts or take her somewhere for your dates so that’s going to cost you, if you get too clingy (which i know you are) they might get irritated.

I’ve seen my friends cry like little asses after their girls dumped them, its obvious that nothing last forever eventually your girlfriend might leave you due to some reasons.

Well love isn’t all that bad there are good times too, so if you can handle all the shits that goes along with love im going to honestly cheer for your success.

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