Luck of the Draw

Hey.. good to see you there (I mean not at the site but.. here). It’s been a while again so it’s natural that some assumptions come into mind, but not as intensive as the last time, it was just a little doubt. But yeah, I guess cons of having a friend with negative thoughts when you are that way as well are feeling a responsibility for the other to be there, and I guess also when you feel awful you don’t want the other to bring on their negativity and depression as well, but rather something to cheer you up. So I completely understand it. I’m just glad to see everyone is allright, I mean alive.
And about the post, life is just a *****. I don’t believe there is such thing as bad luck (or luck), it’s just probability. I think about suicide a lot (last time today very intensly) and although I’m an atheist, I ask myself would I want to die if reincarnation existed. If so you would be in control over a completely new personality so would YOU for example change caring, nice yourself with desires for traveling, exploring, for I don’t know.. some ***** in which bodyand brain you could enjoy but not care about how you threat others? Or some dumb guy who doesn’t want anything more but mindlessly work some low-paying job, earning for food, just surviving day by die, not thinking about anything greater? Or a rapist? It would be bad to just leave those traits and aims, no matter what pleasure would bring healthy body anxiety free. So try using it for good (although I, who am writing this, know how is it hard trying stick to this when depression and escape in suicide hits you).