Since my last post in May I’ve gained and then ultimately lost friends because of how terrible of a person I am. I really don’t know why I try anymore. Maybe I give mmyself false confidence that I can actually be friends with people and have long standing friendships or have people that actually want to talk to me instead of just pitying me. I also started doing online school but I’m still fucking depressed so I have no energy to do work. My mom has gotten a lot more depressed and everything in my personal has gotten worse. So has everything else in the world. I have like 2 or 3 things to look forward to I guess so Idk maybe I won’t kill myself in November.