Why can’t I say that I hate my country so much that I cannot wait until I can stop calling my country altogether? Why can’t I hold an entire nation accountable for all the crimes it has committed throughout history? In addition, why do people have to invalidate me by saying that it has done so much better? What does the tiniest good of a country matter if all it has done is spread violence, hatred, and war?
I was born and raised in the “land of the free and the home of the brave,” the United States of America. I am proud to say that I hate every single minute of it. I hate the people who make it up and claim that they are the freest in the world. This piece of land is not mine because a bunch of stupid whites came and stole it, believing they had the greater right. Could they not lie to themselves any harder?
They love spreading war all because some stupid towers fell, they love to kill and spread hate all because some refuse to conform, they love to steal because they are always hungry, and they love to blame me just for being born for everything that’s wrong with “their” nation. I can’t decide between being lied to that I am free or honestly told that I am a slave. Either way, I’m a prisoner thanks to my own given privilege.
I hate being white and I hate being male, but I love not believing in God and I love having no interest in being fruitful and multiplying. Morality and law and order are the principles by idiots, of idiots, and for idiots, and it is true that there can be too much restriction and too much freedom if distributed as doctrine. It’s clear because acts of putting others under a boot are seen everywhere. Being born and raised in the deep south, Georgia, redneck republican central, and discovering that you are an autistic asexual atheist can lead to more trouble than not. I know what it feels like to live under someone else’s thumb constantly. I can’t point this out, though, because it’s “disturbing” and apparently doesn’t make you any better than the oppressors. I swear that one of these days, the lives ruined by “the land of the free” will have their revenge for kidnapping children and invading and bombing and stealing from others.
I need to force things to make sense. Violence gets a bad rap, and I’m not talking about videogame violence or violence committed against people who don’t deserve it. I’m talking about violence when it is used to gain your independence from those who want to keep me under wraps. The religious insult me every day for being who I am, so I make the point of sending the message back twofold…and all the time I end up looking like the bad guy. I remember watching a few clips of this one TV show. There was this guy who was a news anchor, and he acted very much like House. He was very unorthodox and didn’t care about anything else except the truth. He was interviewing an individual, and he was pressuring and him to tell the truth. Wouldn’t you know it, he came out looking like a bully. I think I’ve mentioned before that the courage to conform is unfortunately more necessary than the courage to not conform.
The rest of humanity has chosen this hell for themselves, and I honestly feel that they lost the right to change years ago. They didn’t change when Charleston happened, they didn’t change when Sandy Hook happened, and they are still not changing even after Las Vegas. They sure as hell refused to change when you-know-who took power.
And you know what?
They don’t deserve to.
I hate my country and I’m proud.