When I first came here, I scrolled through a lot of posts from different users, and was thinking that this was a place where anyone can express themselves. However, after a few weeks, even on a anonymous website, I can’t bring myself to post anything.
I wonder if anyone else here feels the same ?
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Self expression comes easy for some, impossible for others. What’s holding you back, is it that you’re reluctant to share your secrets, or is it that you just can’t find the words?
You can always do what a lot of us do, which is to post whatever jabber comes to mind, then delete your post later. Believe it or not, even that little bit helps.
I’ve been. Here around 2 years and I’ve still never figured out how to get anything meaningful out. IRL as well, I tend to observe rather than jump in. If you’re like that, you’re amongst more than you know. Lots of people lurk for years without even making an account.
What’s holding me back is mostly that my life isn’t nearly as terrible as what I see here. Some people have been abused by their partner or family, some have physical conditions like chronic pain, etc.
I’ve never had any of this.
Everyone has different struggles… if you feel like sharing your thoughts/feelings here, you should. Don’t let some idea that others have it “worse than you” silence you.
It’s not even just “others have it worse”… Countless people have been in the same situation as me and got out of it just fine. There’s no reason for me to feel that desperate.
Comparing yourself to others is never a good idea. (In my experience).
Also, sometimes we just feel a certain way without even knowing the reason.
It doesn’t necessarily matter why you’re feeling something, just that you are. Plus we all have different ways of gauging pain/discomfort.
What could be a minor inconvenience for you may be excruciating to me… Doesn’t change the fact I’m feeling it, or make it any less real.
I know comparing yourself to others is a bad idea. I still do it nonetheless…
I feel you…
Some people are just marked for suicide. If you look at celebrity suicides, you realize pretty fast that there’s no absolute melting point, and I take it further to say half the time we use trauma as an excuse to be depressed/suicidal, when actually the reason is deeper, irrespective of our situations. I say “half the time” because of course the other half is a rape or abuse victim who is pushed over the edge by a single event. But the other half, which probably describes most people on this site, is made up of people who have been this way for a long time in a cloud of darkness, and that tells me the problem is chronic (a lifetime of ambiguous pain) rather than acute (one event which pushes a person over the edge, usually immediately). What I’m saying is that your reason doesn’t really matter, and anyone who tells you your reason for suicide isn’t as good as theirs obviously doesn’t know how life works.
I often think about the guy who invented Nylon. He was set for life, he even had an even greater future of discovery ahead with all the resources he’d ever need. Killed himself and they found half his paychecks had never been cashed. I guess when you’re a corpse it doesn’t matter how or why you got there, it’s just a tragedy that you couldn’t pull yourself out of it.
The thing is, I haven’t been like that for a long time. I can pinpoint how and when it started. I don’t think I’m “marked for suicide”.