My dad is such an angry bastard sometimes. It drains the fuck out of everyone around him. He’s scary when he’s angry. And all this grunting and cussing over 1 dirty dish that my dumbass brother didn’t clean. He starts acting like an animal sometimes when he gets like this. He’ll punch holes in the wall, scream, smash random things, slam doors, and do everything else the Incredible Hulk does when he’s angry. What’s even more pathetic is that I’m a broke 22 year old college dropout still living with the likes of him. It’s scary because he’s done worse in the past. He’s kinda physically abusive. In the past he was worse. And no it wasn’t due to alcohol….as a matter of fact I wish he would drink more often because that’s the only thing that calms him down besides ESPN. Should I just pack my shit and leave soon? I’m already a lost cause. It’s too late to make anything out of myself even if I’m not paying any bills around here. I’d rather have my own place away from crazy angry animals then suffer emotionally. I figure if my mind ain’t right then nothing else can work out right and so far that philosophy has proven to be true. I’d rather pay bills then be someones punching bag. At this point I’m so traumatized that simple things bring me great happiness. I could have my own apartment room with little to no ‘things’ inside and I’d be at peace just as long as I’m not having to avoid stepping on eggshells all day. If anything it’s like avoiding stepping on land-mines. And no it’s not one of those simple slaps on the wrist or simple raise of voice, this man gets FURIOUS over the most petty things. He’s thrown me, scratched me, kicked me, screamed in my face while shaking me violently, etc. I’m a pathetic dumbass for moving back in here.
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My father was never physically abusive. However, he was similar in that he had a short temper and was very scary. Especially when I was younger, his booming voice and angry face terrified me. And small things my siblings and I did would set him off, like spilling milk or leaving a dirty dish, etc. It’s unfortunate. I won’t go into too much detail more about my dad as things mellowed later in my life. However, in your case, since you’ve had physical altercations, I’d say leave. Of course, that’s easy for me to say when I have no vested interest here and no emotional connection. Even when our loved ones are acting terribly we still don’t want to hurt them.
I can relate. My dad is also a fking douche. He isnt as choleric but he is rather psychologically abusive. He was beating me as a child but thats a long time ago. He couldnt do it now coz he knows I would defend myself. Thank god that I dont live with him. He and mom divorced soon after I was born coz no woman could really tolerate him (still had to visit him tho). I am really start to believe he is crazy. He is a religious fanatic, he is always telling people how to live their life and meanwhile he still lives with his mom when he is fking 50 years old (he is driving her crazy, honestly I dont know how she survived living with him for so long). Sadly he lacks any kind of self reflection whatsoever. I never met a person that had less self reflection than him. He just lives in his own world thats far from reality. As I said I really think he may have some psychological condition. He is actually acting normal sometimes and that just confuses me even more. Like sometimes I can just have a relatively normal conversation with him but there are times when its just insanity.
It is never too late dude. You can move out, and live your life however you want it. You are not pathetic. If someone is pathetic it is your father. You should cut him out of your life with no remorse and I should do the same. I know its hard tho. It is still family my after all and he gave life to me. But I need to do it or else he will drive me insane.
I’m worried that sooner or later he’ll turn some of this violent behaviour towards you 🙁
Wow there are more people here with abusive fathers than I thought. Mine was abusive too. It really sucks not being able being able to leave.
Respectfully I don’t think its helpful to say ‘just move out’. I’m pretty sure if they were able to move out they would’ve moved out already. Moving out requires money unless said person wants to live out in the forest or something, roughing it (I wouldn’t be able to handle it…)
I think if you are gonna leave you should make sure there is somewhere to go to maybe family or friends if you have any, sorry if I’m wrong I haven’t really followed your situation.
Well I think we all have a way to relate to each other now. That’s kinda nice knowing there’s others like us out there. We’re not alone. We can understand each others pain. That’s cool. I’ll be here every now and then if you guys need someone to talk to. And yes you are right. I haven’t moved out due to financial reasons. But I think it’s time I try living with some cousins, aunts, or uncles. That’s some good advice. Thanks