I am sorry dad. I am just done. I cant stand it anymore. I have decided. I no longer wanna see you ever again. Sorry. You are just a stranger to me now. I had to do this long time ago but better now then never. I always regret the time I decided to spend with you. Always. You are just cancer. You do nothing but torture everyone around you. Me, my mom and most importantly your own mom. I cant even believe what you are doing to her. She just cant let you go because you are her child and she is too old to get out of this psychological abuse. How are you not ashamed of yourself? How? How dont you just go kill yourself for everything you have done to her and to everyone?
There has been times where you havent been as crazy as your norm but you never acted like a “normal guy” or just a normal human ever. I know there is something psychologically wrong with you but I dont have the energy to do something about it. I dont think its even possible. I have tried. But I cant anymore. It would just destroy me. I need to let myself free of this burden.
After all I your relationship with my mom should have never had happened and therefore I should have never been born. It was just a mistake. My mom was just too weak and depressed and you just took advantage of her and abused her. My mom told me she ran away from her first date with you. Like actually ran away with fear. But you managed to capture her anyway somehow. My mom was already not with you coz she found out what a freak you are. But then she found out she is pregnant with you…. She wanted to abort but you talked her out of it and deceived her to come back to you. From then you only continued to abuse her and you never stopped. Even if you have no power over her now for years so you just abused me instead. But its over now. I am sorry grandma… I am so sorry that you have to live with this in one flat.. this fking human pig that is still draining life out of you when its fking 50 years old. I promise I will visit you when he is not home and try to ease your pain. But thats the only thing I can do. I am sure you understand it. You are such an admirable woman after all. I know you understand. I am still young. I cant let this man destroy another life completely and therefore I have to leave you behind. I am so sorry. I hope you forgive me.
7 comments
Making this kind of choice is incredibly challenging and painful. If you ever feel guilty about leaving your grandma to fend for herself, just remember that their struggle has been going on since before you even existed. And regardless of your involvement, it will run it’s course.
I know what the course is and its tragic. It will kill her eventually. She is an old woman in her 80s now after all. It makes me sad coz she is such a great person in my eyes. She managed to raise four children on her own when her husband died at like 50 of a heart attack. And instead of being grateful my dad just blames her for his dads death which makes no reason at all. What a fking monster.
i ment to say that it makes no sense at all* btw thanks for your comment, really appreciate it.
I cut off practically all contact with my mother and my father decades before they died and for a lot the same reasons as you mention about your father. It is what you have to do sometimes. I do not regret shutting them out.
Why not ask him to leave or move out with your mom and grandma? Your dad sounds like a monster and it’s true some of these people have mental illnesses. It’s too bad your mother-who knew better didn’t abort, which tied her to this man.
My dad was an a.sshole as well. He had his good side but he could also be irrational and stupid among other things. I’m glad my parents divorced because he’s a tyrant and would’ve probably abused us and my mother.
When I was younger I just wanted to get away from my family but once I was older and more sensible, I realized my mother was barely scraping by in life and decided that I really needed to help and she’s been living with me since. We’ve had our fights/arguments but I would never abandon her. Unfortunately my siblings are not so nice.
I’m wondering if you weren’t around wouldn’t your father be more mentally and/or physically abusive towards your mom/grandmom? The best would be to make him leave. If things are so bad then you should definitely get the police involved to remove him from your place. Sorry to hear about what you’re going through. No person should ever make another person suffer.
Correction, I meant while my mom and I have had our issues, we get along very well now and have been a great support for each other. Frankly, I probably wouldn’t be alive today if it wasn’t for her and vice versa.
As for my dad, we get along better now and he’s mellowed out a lot, he’s not as bad as he used to be because I think over time he became wiser. Still I wouldn’t want to live with him.
Me and my mom dont live with him for like18 years now. (But he still keeps writing hateful messages to her) As I said they split up soon after I was born. But I still was visiting him and spending time with him but thats over now. He lives with his mom (my grandma). I cant move my grandma out of there. She is way too old and has been living there for over 50 years.
Would my mom be better if she aborted me? Probably.. You can never know now but I am alive now thanks to this motherfker who talked her out of it and you cant change it so there is no point in thinking about it.