Friday morning, I got back for my second semester sophomore year in college. I am on scholarship (For reference). I had so much going on last month, I had all kinds of bills flowing in and no way to pay them. So I decided to ignore all that and focus on getting to school. Then the moment I got to school, I wasn’t allowed to register in my dormitory because I had “An unpaid balance”, so I check my school account for the first time in a month. There’s a $17,000 bill looking right at me. I’m thinking aren’t I on a scholarship? So I try to check through the nitty-gritties turns out my scholarship was pending and they hadn’t given me my money. I go to financial aid and they just shut me down. I just drifted off at this point. I had a $100 between me and sleeping outside, I didn’t know where I was gonna go to spend the weekend and try and work things out on monday. At this point, I’m thinking I have a $30,000 medical debt which will take me my whole to pay, and a $3000 transport debt I have no way of paying, I lost my only job in November, now I dont have a scholarship or a place to spend the weekend. Through all this, I just told myself buy some rope, you don’t need the weekend just book a hotel for the night should be $60, have a last meal and let it all go. I was resolved for the first time in my life.
As I’m contemplating all this, someone offers to help me sort things out. Long story short. I got my scholarship back. But I lost faith in myself. I’ll never get over this desire, I just seem to be waiting for a reason to do it.
I am 2-faced.
1 comment
Yeah. Once you felt it, It will never leave you. That’s why it’s hard to recover