I can’t even identify why either…. I just feel worse than ever lately, I can’t even write or do anything that I used to even like.
I find myself wondering if I should drink or start experimenting with drugs or anything. It might help, what I’m doing now won’t work…. And I’m lazy so I can’t ever do anything productive.
I’ve been sleeping a lot and crying a lot. My dreams have been horrid too, I wish I could gain the mental fortitude to just swallow my razor whenever I chew on it…. Or maybe if I’m lucky it’ll just accidentally happen…. But I know that’ll never happen I’m a tiny little *****.
I’m also lonely for some reason too, I have friends still but I just feel like I’m becoming more distant with them and soon it’ll turn into just speaking to them once per week, then once every other week, then maybe monthly, then eventually just never. It’s just how things go.