is the juice worth the squeeze?

  January 11th, 2019 by tiredofchronicpain

Is it worthwhile continuing life when you are 29 years old, live with pain, rejected from social circles because of your looks, and stuck with your elderly parents, living day to day in a country with no job prospects, and no future to get better. I am simply alive for the sake of my parents, but they might need to house me for my whole life. My anxiety attacks makes it hard to keep jobs too; so what is this life worth? Please tell me what do do. Would you live under this extreme circumstances? Considering you are also viral on YouTube for saying “hi there” to someone, and now being ridiculed and mocked by your whole country. I haven’t seen the video, but people told me about it. Even if I was sharp as a whip, my whole life is wrecked; I live in the shadow of a self that died decades ago. Why me, I ask as nauseum hence my pitiful misfortunes. I wish I never was born.

The one friend I wanted to beat ended up giving me a middle finger figuratively speaking. He really fulfilled his dreams and summoned revenge. A boy that was so suicidal and envied me once, is now so much higher in life. I can’t believe I lost to this guy. And he knows it…

what exactly is this life still worth? The blacks are burning down farms again. We have no power. I am still doing an internship to hopefully get this job; alas, it’s too difficult and I am unable to work in any other division as no other jobs exists for juniors. Engineers with my advanced speciality don’t get work here. So I’m busted either way.

 

on top of this, I have no social life and stroll in the house of my elderly parents daily: too chicken to off myself because I don’t want to cause them pain. Now I have the inescapable acquaintances I guess you could call “friends” of my parents, visiting and looking for the “updates” to my life, as if they are trying to ridicule my for being still in home. I loathe this existence.

 

ladies and gentleman, it can’t be normal to struggle to this extreme.

My house of cards fell apart long ago – I need out…

Processing your request, Please wait....