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Lonely Existance

by GerbzBaby

Even at the age of 21 I can’t find people who like me. I’m unlikeable and I guess I need to accept that. I’ve only found one person who understands me, understands my mental issues and I believe he hates me. I feel like I lost him after what I said. I had to tell him the truth so he wouldn’t get the wrong idea. I just ended up hurting him. I feel like I’ll never find someone like that who understands me again. Not even my closest friend does. But I believe he hates me as well. Oh well.. time to walk down the lonely road… again.

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Mac-10toSchool 1/16/2019 - 3:15 am

Dont be discouraged. I’m lonely myself, but I also know that it can take a while to find your tribe. There are 7 billion people in the world. Chances are, at least one of them is going to like you for who you are.
I wish you the best of luck.

Cause of Death: Suicide 1/16/2019 - 3:16 am

Lucky to live to 21 I suppose is the way I would look at it, I was going to take my life my 18th birthday but couldn’t afford it, lol, too bad you have to be a little more than dirt poor just to off yourself! Lol.

princessmousy<:3)~ 1/16/2019 - 6:24 am

I’m 25 and clearly can’t find people who like me.
People are touchy, that annoys me. I mean as in having to be careful what you say about people. It sucks if you told him the truth and now he hates you.

Yes there is billions on this Earth but I’m sure it gets discouraging as heck for people who can’t find anyone year after year. And even months can feel like eternity.

Maybe I just hope that someone will show up when I least expect it.

Lostlullaby 1/16/2019 - 11:54 am

I am 22 and I am lucky enough to have really good friends. But I was very lonely until 2 years ago and I am not sure how long those friendships will last as my friends will leave town soon. Even with that I often feel inadequate, weak and different, I often feel like I don’t deserve them. Friendships are great but there not everything. I think the most important relationship you have is with yourself. I truly hate myself despite having people telling me I am a decent and likeable person and so I am constantly whining about how weak, miserable and bad I am. I am so afraid to lose my friends and so convinced I am evil and they would be better off me, that I end up sabotaging every relationship I have. Eventually I m so annoying people end up with no choice but reject me. But I know that now, I can’t really change my behavior but I can be a little less of a pain in the ass and don’t suffocate my friends because I m in a desperate need for attention. So my advice :don’t expect too much from people take what they give you without questioning their intention and be open to the possibility that they actually like you for what you are.

heartlessviking 1/16/2019 - 3:41 pm

Twenty one is not the best age socially speaking. I knew maybe two people who liked me at that age. Now I’m 31 (in 2 weeks) and almost everyone likes me, whether I want them to or not. There are issues that transitioning from high school to college or career. The early 20s are pretty turbulent for most romantically, socially and regarding career.

This isn’t to minimize feelings. It’s to say that there are structural issues that can explain the symptoms of the problem. It hurts, excessively and unfairly. It just doesn’t represent all the possibilities of how things might go.

As far as understanding, really understanding? No one will ever get around to that for me. I have portions that people get, call them modules. To get all of me someone would have to be the entire focus of my attention, no one on this planet can take that in a healthy way. That’s codependent, sometimes even abusive.

I wish I could lift the pain away, but hopefully there is some comfort here in my rattling away about aging and social change.

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