I knew I was looking for love in all the wrong places and I still did it.Opening my legs just to feel needed and wanted. I don’t understand why it only last for a few seconds though. Finding someone who genuinely loved me and all my flaws..is impossible. I know that People who were supposed to love me regardless of my flaws didn’t. My mom, my dad, family, friends. So what did I expect from people who dont owe me that loyalty. I’ve never been loved. I’ve never been thought about. I opened my heart a million times and its been broken a millon time. I glued it back together after each time…and now the cracks are so visible people don’t even try to hide their true intentions. I belong to no one. I am no one. The tears that were once my best friend have even deserted me in this time of need. So now i am truly alone. Is it so hard to want to be claim?
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I guess its still better to look in the wrong places than to just cry alone at home (like me)
Dont give up. If you keep trying to look I think there is a significant chance that you may find someone who will genuinely love you, everyone has flaws that doesnt mean you cant be loved. You just need to get lucky one time and find the right person. On the other hand if you give up and take my approach the chance is exactly 0. Meh I wish I wasnt such a coward.
Your post says it all. Nobody will love your flaws. Nobody.
They may love the way you look, the way you fck, the way you validate their own needy lives, but nobody will love you for who you are. Sorry that I’m not giving you bullshyt about how everything will be ok. Because it wont. Either you accept and live with this shtty existence, or you end it. Love doesn’t exist. There is only mutual codependence.
People will only ‘love’ you if you can offer something they want and can give them that. I’m really starting to doubt that true love exists. ‘Love’ is just like a business deal, if you can’t offer stuff the other wants, no deal. Nobody cares about loving you for you. Nobody does that. Nobody loved me for being me. Nobody was attracted to me for being me. Only for what I could offer them and what they were hoping to ‘turn me into’ to suit their needs/wants
Anyway yeah you can keep looking. Just know that most people don’t have your best interests in mind. People can really be sneaky and cunning manipulators.
I’m not trying to be extremely negative and/or discourage you. I feel that this is how it is. Do people get together because of who they are? No. No. No. No. They offer each other things and like what they have to offer.
By the way, everyone has flaws. I’ve sadly found that people don’t accept flaws even if they say so, and they actually might start nitpicking your ‘flaws’. Actually some people love to nitpick for the hell of it.
If you find someone who nitpicks anyway just stay the heck away from them, at least they’ve made it obvious that they are controlling.
/rantover
Sorry that this situation had such a personal affect on you. You must affectative.. lol (pun) ;-);-);-)
You have yourself. You deserve better and you need to believe that too.