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A serious talk about posting content

by Mac-10toSchool

Sometimes I read posts, and I cant help but feel offended and down on myself. You know? I cant help but think that there are some ideas and opinions that just shouldnt be shared on a suicide website because of how it could effect others. If someone could read your post and feel worse about themselves because of the title or the content, that’s on the line of breaking the hate rule. God forbid someone reads something like that and then goes off to kill themselves. Please be considerate of the feelings of others before you post.

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15 comments

ravingbean 1/19/2019 - 2:41 pm

I agree. Some subjects are just not appropriate for here. It’s beginning to have a social media feel. It’s getting old.

Mac-10toSchool 1/19/2019 - 2:45 pm

Absolutely! The people here are having a hard enough time as it is. We have to consider how potentially dangerous some words or thoughts can be to others. This isnt Reddit. We cant just post what we think and expect everyone to act “normally”, because this is a site full of mentally Ill, very depressed people.

Mac-10toSchool 1/19/2019 - 2:58 pm

I’m trying to be sensitive about this, and I’m not trying to single anybody out. But at the same time, suicide is a REAL thing. people lose their LIVES over things like this. It’s too important not to bring up. In my opinion, there needs to be a rule about this. I hope no one feels bad about themselves after reading this, and if they do, I apologize. but like, the things you post here are of a very delicate nature compared to other social media sites. We cant treat SP like its Facebook, or other sites. People here are thinking about KILLING THEMSELVES, and that’s a big deal, and an important factor to consider before posting.

hiohneh 1/19/2019 - 3:06 pm

SP has been similar to a social media site for the past few years. There are positives to it being that way because users can meet others in similar situations, have a chat, and feel like maybe everything is going to be okay. There are many times I’ve talked on here during bad moments, and it helped calm me down.

However, I understand there is a negative side to this and it can cause others to feel uncomfortable and/or excluded, especially when discussing certain topics. In my opinion, I just don’t feel there is any safe space on the internet. We should just try to do our part to be as kind to each other as possible.

Soda 1/19/2019 - 3:24 pm

If someone is being directly hateful/abusive to someone else here then certainly those posts should be removed and if the person continues then a ban should be considered, only as a last resort because this is still a good site to let people in pain vent-unless that person is simply trolling and refuses to follow the rules or respect others.

However I have a real problem with restricting anyone’s freedom of speech and the word “hate” is so subjective it can be used to delete any post, just because someone complains about it or finds offense.

People who are on the edge of suicide will find any excuse to end their lives anyway. It is not because they read the wrong word on SP which pushed them over that line. One time I was venting about my own problems in my life in a post and because someone had a similar experience they felt “triggered” and reported my post and it was removed.

It had nothing to do with that person, just that they were reminded of their own suffering. Well this is a suicide site so obviously, people will talk about their own suffering. If people don’t want to be triggered by text on a screen, how about not coming here at all instead of demanding other people’s posts (which had nothing to do with them) be taken down?

Imagine if a cop tried to talk a suicidal person off the ledge and said “think of your wife and kids” and the guy jumped because his wife divorced him and took the kids. Is that the cops fault the man jumped or the man’s fault? Most of us are just trying to be helpful to others if we’re not venting about our own lives. Sometimes ideas/words that might upset others are stated here.

I’ve seen some posts that I didn’t like and I simply avoided them. People just need to get a thicker skin and be respectful to others. Getting someone’s post banned which had nothing to do with that person should be considered a form of hate as well. So let’s not be so trigger-happy with censorship.

thehusk 1/19/2019 - 3:43 pm

It’s good if people try to be reasonably kind and considerate with each other. But it’s also good if we can understand that some people can be clumsy with how they express things, or feel the need to vent, and not take it to heart. There’s no telling what might trigger difficult feelings for one person or another. Ultimately, those are our feelings, our neuroses. While we might ask that others be more nuanced in how they discuss things that impact us personally, we cannot demand that they cease discussion entirely.

Someone who kills themselves after simply reading something that didn’t attack them personally was effectively inevitably going to do it – it would just be the ‘straw that broke the camel’s back.’ You cannot avoid reminders of ideas that upset you (believe me I’ve tried.)

Mac-10toSchool 1/19/2019 - 4:38 pm

What I’m speaking of is direct, obvious judgements or statements. There is of course room for interpretation. All I’m saying is, there needs to be a level of sensitivity about how direct and abrasive one can be within a post.

princessmousy<:3)~ 1/19/2019 - 4:54 pm

Anything can be enough to push someone to breaking point and over the edge.

a1957 1/19/2019 - 4:57 pm

Most stories on here seem just fine. Even when it looks off topic it may be a vulnerability that is showing. Then there are those rare postings that assign derogatory labels to us or even target a certain individual with a painful message and when that happens there is the” [!] Report this post ” link at the bottom of each story. Over the years I have lurked many hours here and looked at other suicide sites too. This is one is well moderated.

On that subject, I notice too that a person could be able to moderate nasty comments on their stories themselves, should the need arise. Right under the username that posted the comment is the button with an x in it. I looked it up on the WordPress site and it’s called Commenter Ignore Buttton. Assuming it works, the original poster can use it to take down the unwelcome comment and block that username from making future comments the original poster’s next several posts.

clipped-wings 1/19/2019 - 5:33 pm

Thank you for pointing out what that X is for!

heartlessviking 1/19/2019 - 7:03 pm

Yes, but it is a two edged sword asking people to self censor. On one hand I agree entirely that others are sensitive, who would know that better than I? It’s never clear to me when something or someone is going to trigger something, some memory or unknown depression or suicide trigger.

On the other hand some depressed and suicidal stuff is pretty raw. When people are talking about ending their lives it is kind of a lot to expect them to tone it down. One of the reasons I am able to post the things here is my hope that people here will understand, and not push me out for being suicidal. I’ve been suicidal for a decade, and talked about it in many places. Anywhere else online people will post horrible things or ban for talking about being as sick as I am. There have been times that I open my heart and get pushed off a forum for it, then had to spend a long night debating whether I am really absolutely alone in the world. It’s pretty hard not to look at dying as a better option faced with that level of isolation.

So, yeah, empathy, sympathy, and compassion are what we SHOULD be all about. We need to understand though that some of us this is our last safe harbor to talk about these issues.

I’d also mention that I’ve seen way worse than dark thoughts on here. About a year ago we had issues with trolls posting gore/NSFW/nausea causing stuff. It took a long time to track them down and get them to stop. They’d do it after the mods went to bed and the rest of us would just be drowned out by the bulk of the bad spam. That’s what we need moderation most for.

If I misunderstood what you were getting at, it’s very much regretted. The goal is to understand, but it’s a hard mark to reach some days.

a1957 1/19/2019 - 8:03 pm

Agreed about the self censoring part. I have triggered a lot of people in the past IRL and a couple of people on here. I eventually comprehended how not to trigger people in IRL to the point that, AFAIK, I very very rarely trigger anyone IRL on any given day. But I triggered a couple of people on here and felt bad about it. It sure was not what I had in mind to happen to them. But I think I comprehended how those same words that could be consoling IRL could be interpreted much differently from on a screen without benefit of tone of voice or facial expression.

Really and truly, most people, most of the time, do a fine job of respecting one another on here.

ELECTRICAT 1/21/2019 - 10:58 am

hmm… i don’t usually post my darkest thoughts on facebook/instagram basically this is a safeplace like my get away to take off that mask i worn for weeks or days. a freedom to just speak my mind, things i never get to say to my friends/family. Im sorry if i or anyone here offended/triggered you.

forensic 1/22/2019 - 9:24 am

This post is just plain bizarre. Aren’t you the same person who was post vomiting a week ago about how you hated the world so much you were going to shoot up your school? How do you think that message affected people? Get your head out of your ass son.

Counting Down 1/22/2019 - 9:41 am

I think the idea that suicidal people can have a place where they can say whatever they honestly feel without criticism a great thing. The last thing a suicidal person spilling their heart out online needs to see is “warning: your post has been deemed argumentitive and lacks positivity, it has been deleted and further violations will lead to being banned.”

As a side note, I am a huge fan of irony and gross hypocrisy. I think the idea of somebody with the name Mac-10toschool and a picture of a handgun as their avatar, being worried about offensive posts triggering others is well… kinda hillarious. Like you dont think that name or image might set someone off? Not tryin to be hateful or to pick on ya, just sayin..

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