The thing is, I don’t want to kill myself, I’m not suicidal but I don’t want to be alive.
Does that even make any sense?
I don’t want to kill myself but I don’t want to live my life anymore.
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I’ve felt that before too. Sometimes for months on end. I’ve heard it called being passively suicidal, but whatever it is it’s miserable. 🙁
Yes it makes sense. It could be a Spiritual thing. You know you’re just not meant for this environment. It could also be a chemical imbalance. I mentioned that a while back and someone basically blew me off. Obviously that person doesn’t have a clue what it is to live with a chemical imbalance.
But it doesn’t sound like a chemical thing to me. Some people just sense this place isn’t home. I don’t know what your Spiritual beliefs are but I believe our home is on the other side. I don’t want to push my beliefs on you but if you feel this place is wrong for you being here, I think that’s your Spirit saying ‘What the fuck am I dong here, this place doesn’t feel like home.’
Fully agree with this
If you really don’t want to be alive, suicide is not that difficult and it doesn’t always hurt much. You have to go and take a measured approach and figure out if everything in your life adds up to suicide being the right choice for you. Sometimes people don’t commit strictly because it’s more trouble, frustration, difficulty than they want to deal with or that it feels worth to them.
Yeah ive always told mysef im not suicidal but really wish i hadnt been born. I dont want to die but to never have existed. It makes sense to me but suicide seems to be the only eventual way to come to terms with that feeling. Whenever i think of what i want most in life i dont think of being succesful or having things in general i just really wish i wasnt here at all. I guess ill only be succesful once i find a way to not exist anymore
Maybe what you want is a life that isn’t your current one? Perhaps you wish you were somebody else living better. If this is the case, the best we can do is try to make it there. On the “other side”.
I have a somewhat similar sentiment. Right now I don’t feel like killing myself. I am told and feel that I am quite depressed often times. But the not wanting to be alive for me is just wanting to be me living in a better situation. Where it’s not me in the current but an idealized thought.
I’m stagnant. Nothing has changed much financially or for the future but I have been collecting bits of myself along the way. Time has been going and I’m moving at a pace that’s just not up to speed. Not to say I will give up but I have to try.
In any case, I hope you find out what that means to your own life. Maybe you will find a solution from it.
I wish us all good luck. Hopefully we make it to whatever the “other side” that we seek.
Take care everyone.
Have felt that way before.