Why do I need to fucking work so much and get nothing back? People around me do absolutely nothing and they are fucking congratulated for what they did. Why am I not? Simply because I FAIL! Doesn’t work lead to success? Every, EVERYTIME I work for something (exams and such) I fail. “Yes, you work a lot” people say. But I DONT FUCKING CARE! I want to have good grades in high school. I want to not fail. I tr y as much as I can but I fail. It’s annoying. Am I just dumb or something? I tried all the stupid advice evry fucking person gave to me “try harder, try a different method, blah blah..” No listen I can’t do anything I’m screwed I’m a BIG BIG BIG failure and I’ve had that feeling a thousand fucking times. I keep working FOR NOTHING or I kill myself? BETTER DIE SERIOUSLY. I just don’t want only failure!!!!!! Juste putain de réussir bordel de merde!!!!! Really I don’t know I’m confused will I ever succeed at anything in my fucking life and stop being a Great Big Failure!! If some people around there have success in anything, friends, grades, drivers licence WHATEVER! Just know how lucky you are. You could have been like me. I envy you so much its an obsession.
So what do you say?
I keep torturing myself or I give up and kill myself? I mean its a hard choice I know! I’m just so frustrated and completely lost……… and VERY angry.
2 comments
I definitely identify with that feeling…. no matter how much you put in…. it just doesn’t produce the results.
I’m in that place right now. I mean, why can’t it get better? It’s this binary sense of bad and good, and I want good, but it feels like I get bad…..
But then, I know for a fact that my point of view is crap right now. I have no idea if things are okay or not, just that I have pain. Sounds like you too, and I really want to have something for you better than this:
The world isn’t giving either of us what we want. There’s no fricken way to figure out why, all that is obvious is how.
It’s not that I feel like its bad, I KNOW,
If you have an F (here its 8/20 or lower) you FAILED right?