im too scared (brave?) to commit suicide at this point. i really never did want that. i want to live and live well. but living can be hard when your poor, bad neighborhood, unemployed, getting older, sick, unloved, and judged. i have a good chance at my life improving, my life probably isnt even that bad. maybe im just a lazy whiner. i dont know. i have learned the worst things that are happening in life right now are things most dont know about, and people who have been through such can never talk about. a person cant come up to me saying how they were bullied at school or at work or are homeless or something, i wouldnt feel comfortable. i hate that but its true. 🙁 so i understand i must carry or sink with my burdens alone. if anyone on here can understand any of this rambling, feel free to let me know. hope EVERYONE on here life improves. you all deserve to have your dreams realized.