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Solitary Sounds Like Paradise

by Teresa's Child

At this point I’m wondering if it’s actually better to commit a crime just to go to prison. I don’t like food, don’t care for my family, friends, or possessions. I’d love to be in solitary. I’ve heard the holes are pretty small so I wouldn’t want one of those, but a small dark locked room where no one could enter, and from which I could not escape, sounds wonderful.

Man, those guys have it made.


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T3R3Z1 8/10/2019 - 2:27 am

I’ll tell you, I’ve been lonely my whole life. I have 0 friends. Never had any. I wish we could swap lives. You’ll go insane eventually, trust me. Being solitary sucks ass!

Teresa's Child 8/10/2019 - 9:26 am

Oh I’m already plenty insane 😛

rocketman 8/10/2019 - 6:58 am

Ha ha! “At this point I’m wondering if it’s actually better to commit a crime just to go to prison.” Are you kidding? you think going to prison would be a vacation! 🙂 “I’d love to be in solitary” I created my own solitary, I like being alone a lot myself, but I can get out if I want, it wasn’t always like that I made it happen.

Teresa's Child 8/10/2019 - 9:27 am

I was half joking — obviously prison itself would suck. But it’s not the idea of “being alone a lot”, but “being forced to be alone all the time” that’s so appealing to me. With an emphasis on force, and all the time.

rocketman 8/10/2019 - 10:35 am

OK I get it! 🙂 I was joking too! You could hire me! I’ll keep them away like a body guard. Hey you! get away from Teresa’s Child before I GIVE YOU 3 BLACK EYE’S!! 🙂

muspelhem 8/10/2019 - 7:22 am

Gonna be a killjoy here and say solitary confinement and prison in general probably sounds more appealing from the outside than it actually is. E.g. are you positive that they’ll let you turn off the light? Have heard of places where it was on 24/7. Okay, that was GITMO, but still. Also, doubt the other prisoners are exactly uplifting. You do know how overrepresented sociopaths are there, don’t you? Caged – with predators.

If you’re under 39.5 years of age, you might consider the Foreign Legion. Not solitary, but at least initially, it seems mostly like a matter of following (very demanding) orders. Like in prison, you’ll be thrown together with random guys. A new life!

Cause of Death: Suicide 8/10/2019 - 5:29 pm

What the hell are you talking about? The only thing that happens in solitary confinement in prison is bacteria’s eat your brain while you lay on a stiff bed of cement and feed on dry bread you can’t even swallow while drinking water from the toilet. THAT IS ALL YOU GET TO DO. I would die in a month, no joke 😎

At least not being in jail you have freedom to choose how, when, where, to kill yourself instead of being hustled by fat men you don’t know into a cell where you just waste to death..

Bisban 8/11/2019 - 1:35 am


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