I dont need to forgive.. It would be just enough to just be able to forget… Forget everything and start from scratch. I want to forget how lazy I was all my life. I was so lazy I just let all my weed plants die and now I will have nothing to smoke this year. Maybe its a good thing. But Im addicted and I will buy it anyway. So my laziness will only cost me a lot of money. A ton of money just coz it was too much work to water a fking plant once a day. Id love to forget that.
But mainly I would like to forget all the cringe. Especially the cringy things that I said to my “ex” (she is not my ex rly, we didnt have a relationship but idk what else to call her). These cringe moments just haunt me. I cant get them away from my mind. I started drinking a lot. I never used to drink alone before. I dont even like it but its just something to do (since I dont have weed). The worst part is I cant cant have a good sleep when I go to bed drunk. It feels like Im waking up every 5 minutes.
I just want to forget who I am and have a 2nd try in life. If I just fell on my head and had amnesia or smth.