I had a dream last night. I dreamed that I was on Mars, surrounded by red sand dunes. There was nothing else around me, except a shadow beside me, and a large oval mirror, my size, in front of me. The shadow wanted me to determine whether or not I would be a friend or foe to humankind. The dream was about the mirror. It showed me many things from my life. Real things, fake things. Memories of love, mixed with memories of pain. It showed me the pains of others that had described those pains to me previously. It showed me illusions of war, of death. It showed me a birds eye view of myself as an 8 year old, when It first got in me. It also showed me the happiness of others. Well adjusted people laughing together. Understanding one another. Trying in small ways to make a difference. All the people it showed me were people I know in real life (or knew).
I never made a decision in the dream. Am I a friend to humans? Or do I wish them nothing but the worst? I guess my whole life will be spent answering this question. I’m an outsider. I was an outsider ever since that night when I changed, so many years ago. But still I pretended. I don’t pretend anymore. I live as an outsider. I don’t look for friends anymore. I don’t date anymore. I have cut off my ties with humanity, so I can observe impartially and decide for myself, with eyes unclouded by emotion.
I don’t know. Is there any hope for humankind? Is there anything in our brains that is worth keeping?
What do you think?