Im happy. Im less angry. All things i wanted. Except one. I feel fake. I feel like this isnt me. Overall im happy with my new self excpet for that one thing. But its for the best. Physically health wise it’s good for me. Having high stress levels the way i did was going to cause me to have a heartattack or something. Me. 20 and a heartattack. And i mean why do i feel fake anyway. All it really did was remove the bad stuff. Like how cold medicine kills the bad bacteria. I am surprised that im on day 3 and already noticing a difference. There were quite a few times i would have yelled at people today but i didnt. I thought it was suppose to take 4-6 weeks. Weird. Oh well. As long as my dreams come true i guess.
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Thank you, I am so glad that you are alive! I had prayed for you 3 weeks ago or so, and now I see it works for you, too.
Now, I think you will escape from the prison of suicide. I wish you a happy and fulfilled life and a happy marriage!
I thought I told you to leave me alone
This time, I will. But it was my duty as a human being to be honest and tell you something hopefully kind.
I told you what I felt.
When you make a topic on this website, people will react differently. And I have been here for 4 years. So, I know a bit about human reactions.
As for your behavior and what you did, it’s called ‘existential’ crisis. Perhaps you desire for someone to save you in your worst moments and you see yourself alone near the bridge and the water. “What if jump? What if I jump. Nobody is going to save me… “.
Don’t try to rationalize another person’s experience like that. It’s not necessarily applicable in every situation. An existential crisis is different from ingrained, learned behaviors and coping mechanisms. Just sayin’.
Your duty as a human. What do you do hang out with aliens? Humans are a**holes and that’s why most if not all of us are here to begin with.
I hung out with aliens once. They tried to gestate embryos in my esophagus. Nasty creatures. We should have nuked them from orbit.
Hello, rivets. I don’t rationalize. Anyway, I know what you mean. An existential crisis is much more complex and it involves different levels of ‘angst'(as it’s called by philosophers).
As for insanity, I know a bit of what she has been through, as 4-5 years ago, I was insane like hell. And I acted somehow like her, desperately trying to understand why nobody would help in my worst moments. I was helped, nonetheless, but in my worst moments(like burning my flesh with cigarettes, etc) nobody came…. I was much worse than her perhaps (the difference being that I did not really try to commit suicide). I was aware and somehow I maintained lucidity. Oh, the pain of lucidity. I knew that I was insane. Yet, I still continued to harm myself and feel all the shame.
I suffered from an existential crisis. This was the root of my insanity.
I put lots of questions to myself, too, just like you.
Rivets, a word of caution about aliens ‘ideas’. As I suffered greatly in the past from this kind of delusions.
She was diagnosed with a personality disorder, and those are symptoms of said disorder. I can only speak frankly about this as a schizoid myself. Personality disorders are not quirks or simple things people get over. You can become aware of the issues and find ways to cope with them, but it is most certainly not an existential crisis.
In some of my worst moments, I was also almost totally alone, as I didn’t have friends at the time.
Oh but you do rationalize. Well at least you try to. One can only rationalize so much when all they do is talk about a fake being.
Secondly, you understand me? Please you have no idea all I’ve done or what I’ve been through and to make your situation out to be worse then mine sounds kinda narssacist, no wonders I’m not your biggest fan. I care about others while you look at yourself in the mirror.
In my worse moments I’ve always had friends. Maybe you should question yourself on why you don’t.
Oh and one more thing. While you delusionalize about aliens I’ll be one. I feel the comment rivets made is fine. And it’s my post so….
“I’m not your biggest fan. I care about others while you look at yourself in the mirror.”
Thank you. I know you care about others the same as I do. That’s why I still cared about you.
Anyway, I promise that this might be my last comment on your topics.
You certainly don’t act like it. Also please stop caring. I might have to jump off a bridge just for that.