So the title is pretty self explanatory. I’ll be brutally honest here….I’m a piece of shit! I am selfish loser who will have to do his time in jail. A couple of days ago I got arrested for a DUI that involved two other innocent people. They’re cars were messed up and especially the one that was directly in front of me when I crashed. Thankfully no one was hurt despite how crowded it was however that could of very easily turned deadly. In Arizona it is law that you go to jail at least for 10 days (which is nothing) and can expect time lengths of 6 months up to 5 years in jail. What I did was foolish and selfish so now I will have to do the time. I am not looking for any forgiveness but I just wanted to get this off my chest first and I will be apologizing to those people who I have caused damages to. Any apology won’t mean shit so I’m gonna do whatever I can to pay up for those damages plus some. I know now that I absolutely have a drinking problem. I would deny it anymore because next time it can mean the end of somebodies life.
The next couple of years are going to be some of the most intense and challenging in my life but you know what!….I should’ve thought about the consequences before making a stupid decision. Now I will have to live with it for the rest of my life. What’s done is done and I must become mentally strong so that I can own up to what I’ve done. It all felt like a really bad dream that I just couldn’t wake up from ever since I crashed about 3 days ago. I felt like I could just pinch myself and I’d wake up from this nightmare but no this is my reality now. From here on out it’s sink or swim. I have decided that I will swim. I’m especially gonna need this attitude in jail. I will be challenged and I’ve already assumed the worst will happen in there so mentally I have around 30 days before I will be booked in. For now I will have to do everything I can to prepare myself mentally and physically because it will be one of the most challenging experiences I will go through. There’s always that possibility that I could end up dead in there but hey there was also that possibility I could’ve killed somebody 3 nights ago so really I shouldn’t be bitching about this! That lady had no idea what was coming just like I have no idea what will be coming in my future so if you ask me I say this is exactly what I deserve. Knowing this brings me some peace of mind like that’s where I belong because I do. Acceptance is important because until I do that I won’t be able to change. I accept that I am a weak pathetic timid selfish embarrassment of a man but I also accept the challenge to turn things around not just for me but for everybody. I need to realize that I live in a society of people and I need to learn that there are rules that I must follow for the safety and equal treatment of everybody. I have accepted that there will be no time for comfort in the next couple of years. There’s no time to take it easy anymore and the more I think about it the more I realize that should’ve never been my mentality in the first place. So this is actually exactly what I need to change. This is my life now.
15 comments
I think this is very responsible of you. I also am happy for you that you realized there is a problem and you are going to fix it. I hope everything turns out well for you in the end and you stop drinking 🙂 is there an AA group near by you can join for the extra support?
Yes, I will be going to some before the inevitable in 30 days and I will continue going afterwards as well because I don’t ever want this to happen again.
That’s awesome. I really hope all works out for you. I’m sorry it took you so long to realize but I’m grateful that it wasnt as bad as it could have been 🙂 good luck 😀
thanks
You’ve learned tremendously from this episode, it’s been a wake-up call. As you have referenced in your post it could of been so much worse if there were fatalities. I hope there’s no time but if there is may it pass quickly!
I just served jail time for 2 ‘alleged’ felony DUI… no crashes or anything either times. I was in 40 days, I had to pay $5,000 bail. They just want to make life worse for us suicidal folks. P.S. I wasn’t even under the influence!
how did you survive inside jail? Did you get hurt in there? I’m assuming the worse happens in there. I hear jail has it’s own rules. Like that there’s certain things you should and shouldn’t do while locked up. Don’t be nosey, be very respectful, don’t look people in the eyes unless you are spoken to, don’t give out too much info about yourself, don’t touch or even accidentally touch another mans stuff, never gamble unless you can, never owe anyone anything, stand up for yourself at the first sign of danger to yourself, don’t ask for protective custody (inmates will assume you’re a kiddy fiddler, snitch, etc) don’t befriend the guards, don’t trust anyone, don’t slouch, find a group, don’t find a group. I hear the rules can be slightly different depending on which jail or prison you go to and at times I hear contradictory things from past inmates.
I have a friend in jail right now. Just keep your nose clean while you’re in there. Jail is calmer then actual prison.
Well I was sexually assaulted my first and third day in jail, but it wasn’t that bad. Basically I just tried to sleep it away. I….. admitted to having suicidal ideation so I was put in medical which is VERY quiet compared to the rest of the jail. I didn’t have to worry there about being triggered by other inmates.
I expected I would be released the next day at court because the warrant for my arrest was a misunderstanding, and I wasn’t supposed to have a warrant the judge had declared two days before I was arrested on the warrant. I am thinking the prosecutor filed a warrant after recommending it, even though the judge said absolutely no warrant whatsoever.
Stunned was I, the judge would not let me have a word in, I could not explain the judge had priorly ordered NO WARRANT WHATSOEVER, & he set my bond for 150,000$. Then, I come to see, a charge I was arrested for 2 months prior for – POSSESSION – accidentally bringing marijuana (dropped a little tiny bit on my car floor) back to my state after using in a state is legal in . . . the cop had changed the charge to felony DUI. Which made 2 felony DUI.
I had no clue what made the officer think I was under the influence at the time of the second ‘Felony DUI,’ I had had no marijuana on my person or no incriminating evidence whatsoever. He said ‘I couldn’t control my body.’ I think they just wanted an excuse for a blood draw and urine test, because I travel to use in the next state 1 hour away 2x a month, where is legal, and I don’t drive on it, and don’t bring back to my state – BUT BECAUSE I USE IT THERE WHERE IS LEGAL, it showed on my blood, urine tests. He whispered in my ear during the arrest, “do you want to know what I think?” I shrugged. “I think that you are smoking METHAMPHETAMINE.” LMAOROLFLOL.
They are showing to be downright neglectful and unconcerned that I had not been under the influence at the time, but had come back from traveling to where it is legal and using earlier that week. Maybe it had violated my unsupervised probation, but I really don’t know if I was ordered not to leave the state.
I expected my bond to be reduced at my next hearing – he would not budge from 150,000$. I was still sure that the warrant was not approved by the judge and was simply a misunderstanding. Another woman I was celled with said the same thing, her arrest was a complete misunderstanding and she was thrown under the bus and lied by her friend she is staying with who said he is abusive and will tie her up in the house and leave for hours and not feed her. (The last time I was in jail, another woman had said her husband got her arrested because she had disobeyed him, simply yelled at him.)
The worst thing was there were bugs in my cell. In the shower drain to be specific. I would kill the bugs – then – 20 more would crawl out. . . I went in the shower without shoes once, and my feet began to grow fungus. I started getting, like, bed bug bites or something all along my backside, even around my anus, all Along my arms. My hair began to fall out because they don’t give you real shampoo, conditioner. Around my 5th day in jail, I began a strep throat infection where my tonsils started to swell up to humongous size and I quickly requested antibiotics, this cured it in 7 days. About 10 days in, I began to not be able to feel my hands. I began to not be able to sleep through the nights and half the day I would be starving. The food was inedible, I joked, I would compare it to something that should only be fed to mentally handicapped children in grade school. No offense. LMAOROFL. I sat in court in chains and watched all the folks on methamphetamine charges be released on their own recognizance (free of charge), should they obey court orders. Finally on day 42, expecting to be let out on my own recognizance, because after all, the warrant was a misunderstanding to begin with and was ordered by the judge to not be placed, but was ultimately placed anyway without his real approval – I had my bond reduced to 50,000. I could not stay another day so I managed to fork out 5,000$ for these beastly folk.
It was frightening to see, sentences being set to people for 10 years or more for crimes such as possessing methamphetamine, although some people can do it — and nobody bats an eye.
everything you say is SO far out there, how can anyone believe this? i find it hilarious how gullible people can be. youre nothing more then a troll
why pray tell was my comment deleted? ive seen this person say a lot worse and their comments didnt get deleted. why can they say whatever they want? this is discrimination
He asked for my story, so I provided. A few medical problems and an unreasonable bond. I’ve shared how it is calm & peaceful in medical isolation or in the smaller units. But he said he was expecting just ten or so days.
Do you really need to scare the guy? As long as he keeps his nose clean he should be fine. Besides you would have went to a female jail which is COMPLETELY different
I was scared myself. I expected to be out in a few days, but I was in for 45. Just think about the people in for years. It really isn’t pretty. I’ve been out for 3 weeks and still am frayed and have scars on my body from my sentence. He shouldn’t have it too bad, he says he will only be in ten or so days. I might have to serve 6 months down the road. I hope not because I’m not good at these things. Lol.
You should look up Lockdown 23 and 1 on YouTube. He will prepare you what to expect and his videos are titled well enough that you could find things you’re specifically curious about. Good luck if you end up in there for a while, you’ll come out a better person.