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by imissyou

My medications either are not working or I’m having paranormal experiences.
I saw a figure crouching by my door watching me sleep for awhile. I am wondering if it is just sleep paralysis because I saw it and wanted to scream and fight it but couldn’t move. I also felt some sexual sensations by what I think was another figure, but I couldn’t turn my head to see it.  Like one figure was watching this other figure rape me or something.
I have an appointment with a therapist tomorrow, so that’s the good news. I’m wondering if this is just the long term impact of sexual abuse. I don’t have a firm diagnosis, but I know the term psychosis has been thrown around. I wish people treated me better. It’s like once someone finds out you are mentally ill, they just write you off as a complete nut job. Makes me want to die because of just how much stigma there is.
Also, someone left some handprints on my car, and it freaks me out. I’ve been wondering how or why they did it. It might have just been some drunk college student because I live in a college town close to some bars, but when I tried to recreate what they did (pictured below), I couldn’t get the prints to be that prominent and dark despite rubbing my hand on gravel dust for several minutes. I wish it was the handprint of an angel, but I’m wondering if someone is creeping on me.

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