I’m so tired of pushing everyone I love away, I don’t get how can I be so scared to be lonely yet I push away everyone that cares about me and has a big part in my life. It sucks to not understand your own feelings, it sucks to loose yourself slowly and not knowing who you are anymore after so many years of suffering in silence
i just wish I could be the person everyone expects me to be, but I’m nothing more than a big failure in everything.
I don’t want to be too negative. Maybe it does get better, maybe life gets better and the pain becomes bearable, but you have to act on time, otherwise it will be too late. And I really think it’s f*cking late for me.
1 comment
It definitely sucks and you’re not the only one. I think there are a lot of reasons why we push others away. With me, this is sick I know, it’s almost like a test to see who sticks around. But it also makes sense because why waste your & their time if they’re not in it for the long haul? Your reasons may be different for pushing people away, but there’s usually some logical explanation. We’re not crazy, just in pain.