Let this blood soak in my hands
I’ll take the blade and place it to my neck
How simple is that
Everything is fine, isn’t it?
All it is is anxiety
Or is it?
Let me drown in the blood of my body
What a better way to go
The bones of my mind ache
Emotions are too hard to handle
I know I’m messed up
So what?
Who cares if I understand myself or not
It’s not gonna help
Nothing did
No blade, no person, not the forcing down of emotions
Nothing’s worked.
Who cares?
I need to say something
I need it to make sense
It hasn’t.
I can’t tell if I’m in fantasy or reality
And no one around me knows either?
Who cares?
All of you do
Maybe you’re just saying that.
You’re just saying that.
It’s better when I’m alone.
All expectations fade to the wind.
It’s just me. And I do not judge myself around myself.
But emotions hate me whenever anyone comes near.
My past I hate it.
What it’s done to me I cannot say
Many thoughts I have on it.
None of them are the answer.
Maybe there is no answer.
Who gives a damn?
When I’m dead it won’t matter.