Is about to push me over the edge. In the past 8 years from my most suicidal to now, I had several years of long phases where I was fine. This year though is all kinds of twisted. I don’t even wanna live anymore im running on auto pilot. I just want something to kill me cause I don’t have the balls do it myself anymore. I just can’t. It doesn’t get better, I thought it did but its all one sick game and I’m never gonna get to relax. I’m suffocating mentally…why can’t I just suffocate physically. I’m over this. Goodnight.
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Yep. A fancy death, not in your own hands would be amazing… It’s like someone has been squeezing a pillow on my face for years. It probably won’t get better, yes. Thank you. Tired of people telling me, it will. Goodnight.! And pick a soft pillow.