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I don’t deserve anything good in life.

by just_a_person

So I have a friend whom I could talk to about all of this shit right? Thing is, I regret telling him because I keep thinking how he shouldn’t have to constantly worry about me (which he does) and honestly, who in the right mind would want to be friends with the depressed, self-harming, suicidal girl? I guess a person who really cares about me. Still, I don’t deserve him and I told him that but he proceeded to say, “you deserve every good thing you have, your absolutely fucking perfect to me.” and yet I still don’t believe that. I’m not sure how long I could keep this up.

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Robert77 12/17/2020 - 6:11 pm

Maybe I have never been in my right mind but I have always been attracted to the depressed and hurting types. I guess its because Im also that way. My Bipolar ex has the same attitude you have in that she doesn’t think she deserved my love and anything good in this life so she just destroyed everything including me. She could never believe I hurt just as much inside because I came from a better family than she did. My family isn’t all that great btw. Im not going to lie to you because although I married a chronic suicidal person I have also attempted to end my life more than once. Facing death wasn’t all that fun and it was scary when I was there. My own dad just ended his life and Im afraid my son wants to do the same and I think the car he recently crashed was an attempt. I get mad at God for not taking me already but Im here for some reason I can’t see yet and we really won’t go until it is our time. I hope you learn to be loved and cared for.

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