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Is it a bad choice to kill myself…? I don’t think so.

by just_a_person

I’ve been numb for a few weeks now, and I absolutely hate it. I hate not being able to feel happiness. I miss the girl who used to smile and actually mean it. I miss the girl I used to be. I really just want to die tbh.


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arlo.exe 1/18/2021 - 10:01 pm

same ms girl, same. this is actually really similar to how i feel

JudgeMeNot 1/19/2021 - 1:50 am

Suicide is always a door left open.

heartlessviking 1/20/2021 - 12:35 am

Is that all there is to life? feelings? wow, I’ve been dead for decades then, because I had my capacity for happiness beat out of me a long time ago. Feelings hurt, numb is the defense.

What productive end does death bring? We are sorry excuses for fertilizer, our culture chooses the most destructive and depressing degradations to do to our corpses, and everyone pretends like the dead person mattered. I’d pay serious money for someone to get up at my funeral and say; “He hated this place, and all of us for caring so much that he struggled to leave. He’s gotten his wish, and if he was here he’d say it came far later than he preferred.” Of course, that isn’t verifiable by me, hence a waste of my hard earned money which is the most arbitrary measure of value ever created, but apparently the only objective way of allowing exchange of goods.

Mauve 1/20/2021 - 4:30 am

This is what I feel everyday. Feels like time abandoned me and made me stuck in this situation only thing that I might escape is to die. I also don’t feel myself anymore, I literally don’t know who am I looking at the mirror.

fxd45tsp 1/21/2021 - 5:22 pm

I used to think that if I ever encountered a suicidal person, I would do the “honorable” thing to stop said person. I would be regarded as a hero. Man, was I wrong…

Now, if I was to encounter a suicidal person, I would not do anything. Nothing to help (because, you know, criminal liability). But I sure would not stop them either. I would just stand there, like a dear facing incoming headlights. And just that behavior would get everyone around me horrified if they knew. They would probably say: How could you, you sick heartless bastard! Actually, I would not be heartless because I would feel empathy toward that person.

I mean, if you truly love someone (or at least wish them well), would you not let them go on? Who am I to decide who should live and die on their own terms? I do not think I have any say so in the matter. Not my life.

Questions might be: Did you smile in front of the mirror thinking you meant it, even though might not have known any better? Or are you facing the harsh reality of life viewed from a third person? Rhetorical questions, no need to reply.

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