i had a great opportunity to make world a better place some time ago.
by getting miscarried.
it’s official. i am negative value now. less than worthless.
my father was right all along. first he wanted to have me aborted, then, he daydreamed of me committing suicide.
all of this life was for nothing. it was all pointless.
this was a messed up month. it seems that i had some very deeply buried problems, which i couldn’t quite grasp. but my brain, given time, somehow tracked them down and solved them on its own. without me consciously putting much effort into it. sometimes even during sleep.
i will now go back to living my pointless blatant life and i promise that i will never talk to humans ever again. i will read books and write a diary instead.