I always want to help people. But despite this, I can’t even help myself. I always try to be a good son. I’m the good one. The happy one. The prodigy. I’m supposed to be smart but I do dumb things. I try to do good at school but I these voices screwed me up. I have no one. I always am good for my parents. My dad is always stressed from work. My mom has bad bipolar and depression. She also has anxiety. I try to help my dad whenever I can. I always obey them. They are kind, but the voices in my head aren’t. I want to scream. I want to die. Nobody listens. I can’t worry my parents. I don’t trust my friends. I always give the best advice with the best intents, but they ignore me. I want them to be happy. My siblings are better than me. They’re smarter. They’re better looking. I’m ugly. I’m broken. I’m fat. I’m worth nothing. I am nothing. School just pressures me more and more. They act like they care but they only hurt me. Counselors don’t care. Teachers don’t care. Nobody gives a damn about me. I can’t tell anyone. I want them to be happy. But I can’t be. I can’t tell anyone. I have pains in my sides. I tried to tell my parents, but they kept forgetting to get me to the doctor. I haven’t told them about how I might fail my grades because I don’t want them to find out about my problems. I just have lie. Lies. Lies. Lies. Lies. Lies. I only want them to be happy. But at what cost? Society doesn’t care about me. I can’t change that. I will forever be nothing. If I died none of you would care. Hell, you wouldn’t even know. Same with school. Only my family loves me. I can never make myself happy. I have no one. I am no one.
3 comments
i wuv u <33
How does someone who is noone become someone then?
well, your family loves you, that’s more than many can say. Not that I expect that to be a comfort. Everyone is doing their best under unfortunate circumstances, “normal” people won’t admit that they struggle, which is why they suck.