I’m irritable and I think I’m manic. Hanged out with my friend over the weekend after isolating for a few weeks. Now after being around people and going shopping I feel very uneasy. I have a phone appointment with my psych doctor in two hours. I’m so scared of being hospitalized again. I just want a normal life. I want to visit friends, get a job. Im too sick to start dating again but I’m starving for an intimate relationship. I’ve been living in a bubble since I quit my job and now after being out and about I feel worthless. Killing myself is easier.