I just cant

Im overwhelmed. By what? Everything.
Specifics? None.

I just dont have the energy, most people would call me a huge disappointment spending all my time online. I just feel like shit and want to disappear. I wrote once that i self sabotage and got the question “any idea on why you self sabotage?”, i really dont know. Its all just shit and i cant bear with it. I think im having exestensial crisises a little too often, like i fucking exist? Like i am in this fucking body i move arm up i move arm down. And then i start thinking “what the fuck am i doing with my life”.

I dont even know what im trying to write here rn, its just a mess. Just i want to be done with it all.

Everything would be better if it was to disappear.