I can’t do this anymore. I just need to escape this world. Escape this prison of my mind. I’m alone, and I’m selfish and worthless and rotten. I can’t live with myself if no one is there for me. I’m tired. I’m so depressed and in constant pain. I think of walking away and never coming back. Walk away from all responsibilities and the past and myself and just keep walking. No need to come back. No one wants me back anyway. It hurts so much. It’s not gonna matter if I’m alive or not. So what’s the point. If dyings the only way out, of this shit life is, and how shitty of a person I am, then so be it. I’m not able to just keep holding on to nothing, living on in this loop for nothing but shit. I can’t anymore. Doesn’t anyone understand? I can’t fucking do this anymore. I need help too, I need attention too, I need to feel loved and appreciated too, if I’m to live… but I’m clearly so unworthy of love. And no matter how much I try to better myself I fall into this rut… I despise myself with everything I have. I despise this life and this existence. I try so hard. I can’t anymore…
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4 comments
I wish I could reach through my screen, to tell you to your face that it’d be okay, then I’d make you a cup of tea. Small comforts, but if I had the ability to give them…. *sigh*
you’re trying so hard, and I at least know how hard it is, how much pain. I hope this reaches you having made it through the day. Don’t think beyond that, today is enough. I would miss you if you were gone, you are a special person, and it’s so wrong that there isn’t someone there with you to tell you that.
I’m rarely saddened to silence, even now, and it’s okay to be sad about what has become of your life. It’s a loss, it is okay to mourn it. You aren’t alone in your struggle, we’re all in this together.
This comment means so much to me right now… I would be very grateful for the tea and the small comforts.. I’ve made it so far today, even though I feel like I shouldn’t have. I’m worth nothing…
But thank you for your mind words… I dont know you but it means something to hear someone would miss me… and to say that I’m special or worth anything at all. I’m so alone anymore.
I’m mourning life as a whole, as everyone on here probably is as well. Sorry this is all over the place but wanted to reply back…
Honestly just wish someone would blow up the whole world so the last few little business suit wielding men, in their little “trick the crowd into going the wrong way while they take a small plane to Galapagos” can play little card games and sip on coconut juice with circus peanuts for currency in this massive universe that cares for no one.
Or Gaga, With her shit hands on house of Gucci waving around “I’m not signing papers” because she’s on uppers and “geniusly confused who she even is”, delighted to treat everyone else like dirt, telling someone to drink poison when she’s an ugly clown bc she somehow forgets once again who she is then gets bad reviews and does it some more bc she’s nuts. Yeah, she can get on the little plane too bc she’s equal too, right?