I feel like nobody and I’m done with therapy because my idiot therapist can’t help me and he just tried to guilt trip me on how he thought it was wrong that I tried to KMS in the past and he tries to tell me with stigmatizing language that I’m wrong for trying to escape the pain in the past, but yet tries to justify everyone else for pushing me to that point and making me feel this way just because they’re in authority! I feel like I’m a fucking slave to this pain and I’m obligated to stay in this earth with this mental illness that no one can understand or even relate to because I fight this burden alone on a basis. Why do people demand me to take accountability for my own feelings and not just my own actions but yet they can’t take accountability for hurting me? I feel like I’m not even entitled to my own emotions and I don’t even wanna share them anywhere besides here. It’s not like it matters what I gotta say anyway. And stupid therapy ain’t therapy anymore, because if it was, my therapist would try to understand the reason why I tried to ctb in the past, instead of stigmatizing me and shaming me for making that decision! And all he says is “I wanna have this session to make you feel better, not worse.” Bullsh*t. I don’t wanna be here another day, but I’m gonna have to, because it don’t matter what I feel worth a shit and I don’t ever wanna be thrown in a psych ward with complete strangers ever again.