I used to have a bad friend named Brent. Brent was the type of guy who called himself my friend, but really only kept me around to make fun of me. He put me down all the time, drew things on my face when I passed out at parties, and did all kinds of cruel things to me for no reason. At that time in my life, I hated myself, and so never stood up to him.
I haven’t seen Brent in years.
I bought a knife a long time ago. I’ve carried that knife in my pocket every day since I got it, so that if I ever ran into Brent again that I could either hurt him or kill him. I wanted him to understand the pain and humiliation he’s caused me. I wanted him to have a moment where he realized that all those things he did to me resulted in his eventual demise.
However, lately, I’ve been thinking about getting rid of the knife instead. Holding onto vengeance has turned me into a really hateful person in general. It takes up a lot of my internal energy. Energy that I could be using to make a more peaceful life for myself. Energy I could be using to love and respect myself better.
So today, I’m going to get rid of the knife. Brent will never say sorry, even if I did happen to run into him again, which is unlikely as it is. I’m going to let go and just forget about him. He never deserved my energy to begin with, and I’ve given away too much of my time over him as it is. Today, I let go of my grudge, and I start along a different, more peaceful path. I hope this is the correct choice. I believe it is.