I have decided after 36 years of living that 2025 is going to be the year i finally rid myself of the sadness that has plagued me my entire life.
I have in the past 10 years done EVERYTHING I can to make myself feel better and feel well. I will continue improving myself and my life for the next year also.
If this feeling does not stop and my sadness does not dissipate, I will end my life.
4 comments
Wow, 10 years of actually trying. I guess this makes me feel less bad about NOT trying in a way O_o. I mean, I’ve tried, on and off, for the last 19 years. And it’s this cycle of trying and trying, getting nowhere, and then sliding back into depression and hopelessness. Rinse and Repeat.
Well kudos to you to have that oompf, that desire and drive, to get better. I’ve lost that oompf, and life is hard as hell when you lose that.
I’d like to see good things out of 2025, but I’m still very much in the mindset of maybe. Maybe it will, maybe it won’t. I can only eliminate possibilities. I think I’m very likely to get out of state and into grad school, so that’s two major steps.
To get all the way to feeling better though in 12 months is a tall order. I can advance, but it’ll be years before those advances look like they will last.
I also don’t think quitting life entirely is the direct answer, rather I think disengaging more is a better middle ground. I have a few more rounds to run, then I can rest and let the world go round without me. I can let my career die without having to actually have my body do the dying thing til it’s ready to do it naturally.
what degree would u get?
lol- “careers” are such a joke in 2025
back in the day- a “career” was a nice stable job with enough income to support at least 1 full person, if not 2. now, a “career” barely supports 1, and one can get laid off any time. and if you’re 64, they’ll fire you right before you qualify for retirement or their companiy benefits. that’s how it always works, those bastards.
Not a bad idea…I was giving it more time, but I’m going to shorten it….probably until my elderly mother ‘expires’ and if my life doesn’t get better.
I have my up and down days…but the things that used to interest me before, really don’t any more. I just live in the moment now, having mostly neutral emotions…just doing what I need to do to get by.
I might be at a turning point soon, if things keep improving and if they do, great…I’ll keep going but if not, I’ll just give it a few more years. I’ll give my ‘goodbyes’ now to the few people that matter to me.
I’m smart enough to know when I can’t win in this crappy life. I see a lot of suffering in the world that I wish I could fix, but I can barely fix my own life, let alone help others.
I’m hoping my life will get better…but now I’m dropping any false hopes that it well improve if I stick around for 10 yrs or so, and needlessly prolonging my suffering. Our end is the biggest day of our lives…that’s why we fear it so much and so many of us just keep going rather than ‘check out.’
Here in Canada we have maid and I think I will apply for it, should I feel in the next year or two, things aren’t improving for me…I’m sick of going through all the same emotions.
The biggest ones are my regrets for not taking advantage for dating and also career…I was a mess, this world partly made me that way. Now that I’m older and not in shape (but working on it)…also no longer in the right places, I don’t get such chances any more.
It all seems to go by so quickly. If I can’t have a normal life, like most people who are middle class and have a nice home/spouse, maybe kids, but not crazy about that…there’s little reason to go on.
I’m going to be in old age anyways in under 10 yrs from now…so if I’m not established by then, then there is zero reason to continue as I am today.