Self-Help Books are Fucking Bullshit.
Either it’s all “think positive” crap or it tells us to “just think differently.”
Yeah well thinking differently doesn’t change the facts- if you are poor or sick or have no job, or a job that pays shit, “thinking different” or “thinking everything is fine” isn’t going to magically change your situation or make your problems go away.
Actual lines in this self-help book I’m reading:
“We think that wanting is the source of our satisfaction. In fact, it is the source of our dissatisfaction.”
“To want to is believe that you are lacking, inadequate.
The present moment lacks nothing. The present moment is all that is.
First, find the contentment, the joy, the peace where you are.
Experience what is, what actually is, not assuming there’s a lack, then decide what, if anything, you want.”
“THIS IS IT. Anything else is just our “better idea.”
“There is nothing wrong with the universe.”
“The only wrong is in our thinking. In our believing in our “better idea.”
This is another one of those “Own nothing, be happy” crap that is shoved down our throats. Be happy with what we have and stop complaining. “There is nothing wrong with the universe?” Tell that to the MILLIONS of starving kids in Africa, or all the people living in poverty in the US or around the world, or in war-torn countries.
You have to come from utter privilege to say this crap:
“The present moment lacks nothing.”
Yeah, if you grow up middle or upper class, the “present moment lacks nothing.”
“You’re poor? Well just think differently.”
Problem solved. -_-
Good grief, I am getting angry just reading these “self-help” books.
10 comments
Self help books are a toned down, superficial version of spirituality. It’s similar to woke ideology vs communism. Woke ideology superficially cherry picks certain idea from surface of communism, ignoring everything else, the whole base. That’s why these things sound good but don’t work.
The idea of law of attraction in ‘The Secret’ book was also taken from spirituality. It became popular in wannabe rich people. Elliot Rodger believed in it, bought lottery tickets strongly believing, wishing and praying that he is gonna win, and was immensely frustrated when he didn’t. Probably wouldn’t have gone on killing spree had he won.
Well, capitalism will do this, squeeze people to do and find any ways to make money so, you can’t hate them too much for writing self help books.. they’re just trying to survive. Some of them make big bucks, some make probably closer to zero. Much like books overall, video games and stuff.. many, many try, a small percentage succeed.
At the end of the day, everyone probably know what they need to do to get better in life, it’s just mustering the will to do it that is the problem..
I should write a book, titled “how to kick your own ass”.. lol.
Joke aside, psychotherapy seems to be the expensive answer the modern world came out with. Tried it many times, didn’t help much so far. Meds? Nope. The older I get, I think my dad was onto something, “have projects going”. I guess have people you care about in your life too. Men, in general, tend to like things, and woman, people. That’s why most engineers are men, and most nurses are women. Of course it’s a spectrum, and nobody is the same but, I’d say this alone, with some good life habits (sleep schedule, exercise, getting some sun, healthy eating and taking care of health overall) is probably a part of the answer. Oh, and stop drinking alcohol, seriously, it is making people (including me) depressed.
There, saved you 20$ on a bs self-help book.. : p
joke aside, you’re right, the answer to happiness probably can’t be explained in a book. I know some really poor people seem like the happiest of them all tho, and I’m here sitting on my pile of cash, and I’m miserable so.. don’t think money is the magic answer.
Hope you can find happiness wherever it is
Holy shit, what kind of delusional rich kid wrote those turds of wisdumb?
Yeah that’s actually my gripe with therapy at large. It assumes that the only thing wrong is the person’s mind and proceeds to try reshaping the person’s way of thinking. But no amount of reshaping will pay your rent to keep you from being homeless, or stop some abuser/bully from destroying your life, or bring back a dead loved one.
“There is nothing wrong with the universe.” <- Anyone who says that needs to spend some time in a fucking Turkish prison.
The best self help book I read was probably Sanity & Grace by Judy Collins (yes the singer) where she described the pain she went through after her son's suicide. But just when I was starting to relate to her, she got all religious and said god is what sustained her bla bla bla. So again, no answers just delusion.
Yeah, I’m gonna talk for myself only, cause these things are rather personal and touchy, but believing in god for me is a cope out. An imaginary friend for adults. Would be nice to have someone watching over us, protecting us, making sure we’re in line with the universe but, nothing in my life, or anybody I know, matches that reality. I understand and respect those who do believe, and bless them.
I’ll take my chances with roasting in hell tbh. I’m sure the turkish prisons are the hell on earth version tho, so, I’ll keep out of those!
Yeah man I have family members who bought into hardcore religion and used it as an excuse to become shitty toward others, so I have a somewhat bitter aftertaste regarding that. That said, at the end of the day I suppose we all need to cling to some reason for living, so if a deity gives that to people, then sure why not.
But I certainly don’t think it should be the big reveal of a self help book! Talk about a “deus ex machina” ending… Suppose you’re a novelist writing a story and you can’t figure out how to resolve the plot logically so you end it with god saving the day, you’re just a lazy writer lol
One of these days, somebody will write a book about how self-help books are bs and get rich off of it, simply because there are a lot of people who feel the same way.
Perhaps even me, lol
That has already been done. There’s podcasts/YT videos on those too. But they also get paid/monetized to have views/clicks, so there’s pro- everything and anti-everything out there. And they all claim to be “professionals” which means that professional advice ain’t worth a shit these days.
I’ve been told by several well meaning but clueless people to write a book, and this is exactly why I don’t, I talk to people, anything you write is going to be way off the mark for someone. If it was as easy as reading a book any of us would have lifted ourselves out, and that doesn’t happen.
The market is also crazy oversaturated, you can walk into any thrift store and buy a bunch of them for fifty cents a piece. It’s like romance novels, quite a lot of poorly and quickly written crap to satisfy a certain demographic. I’m not in the demographic that it works on, so I don’t know why it sells in the first place.
There’s a long list, team sports video games is another one that jumps to the front of mind, who buys those? They keep making them, but who buys them? I’m befuddled by the market for them.
Paid meditation apps are another one in the mental health space, what the hell is the point there. I can meditate fine without shelling out money for someone to remind me. I guess rich folks need affirmations.
I guess I just wish I was rich enough to be able to not miss the money I’d spend on a personal trainer, meditation app, yoga app, yoga classes, smoothies, and all the high class treats that wellness gurus spend their time pimping as necessary for mental well being….. it would cost more than I used to make just for that. Those people have got to be making over $200k just to afford that lifestyle.
No wonder there is a groundswell of death in youth deaths of dispair, no one can afford the lifestyle of health. I’m being snarky, just to be clear I think $60k a person would be plenty if we didn’t have an unnecessary trade war going on. I won’t be able to calculate what wil be enough under the trade war until sometime in August.
I get that any random Joe can write a book and have it “published,” but these are so-called “experts” writing these books- therapists, licensed counselors, blah blah.
LSWs and counselors are paid shit and most do jack for their clients.
Then again, the term “expert” is way overused as well. Everyone is an “expert” these days.