Fun project, I’ll play; Five reasons my life and the world is great,
1;The concept of narrative
You could call it my first love, if there was no economy to shackle me I would serve the narrative and write and craft with it. Everyone has a narrative, and I have said often that humans are creatures of narrative. A narrative is a story, and we are the authors of our own stories, we trade in stories, we listen to stories, and we change the story and that is how we deal with pain in the most fundamental ways.
Probably one of my favorite shows is Jim Henson’s The Story Teller and the opening just nails it for me; “When people told themselves their past with stories, explained their present with stories, fortold their future with stories, the best place by the fire was saved for the story teller”
Which is why that’s how I see myself. Strip it all away, all the degrees, certifications, jobs, trainings, the other hats I wear, I’m a story teller. And I do tend to get the best seat by the fire. People love to hear my stories.
2. There is a justice to this world, people get what they have coming, and someone remembers everything. I had trouble placing this because it could just as well go on the other side. Yet I get the better of this more often than not.
I’m getting a good schadenfreude today as I watch another scumbag suffer their own actions backfire, it happens several times a week. I also see my actions reward me often enough that it seems like my work is worthwhile.
My work is in behavioral modification, I design rewards and so it is my job to be an artificial form of this thing. Yet, sometimes I get tired. Sometimes I have to let the universe do the thing. I have to let my collegues help, or the rest of the system do it.
So, knowing the system does do it, knowing that I’m not the ultimate backstop is a comfort I need.
3; Moving from more universal things, this one is personal; I’m well off enough, I can stop if I want to. I’ve been threatening to and if I have to I will. If I was chained to this life without escape, I’d feel a lot worse…. but I’m not, my escape is available. No one forces me to do anything. I am doing what I do because I choose it.
Yet, because I had a few public breakdowns a few years ago, everyone backed off and stopped forcing me to work jobs that forced me into complete breakdowns.
4; I’m still relatively young. 37 is young enough I can still have kids, I’m hoping it works out.
5; I have figured out what I want out of life, and apparently that’s something some people never do.
Other side, five things that are awful.
1; the economy. I’ve been working for twenty years and I really think I should have accomplished more in that time. Then there is AI which apparently is approaching appocolyptic levels, and I don’t want to talk about how I feel about IT or crypto, and there are some doom things that would help but those don’t show up
2; politics. my country is in rolling constitutional crisis, fascism, and nationalism….
3: religion….. Christianity mostly, but I have bones to pick with Scientology and a few other cults.
4; Oklahoma…… I don’t know how to explain Oklahoma to anyone not in it. We’re entering Summer in Oklahoma which should be something done to people who commit sex crimes or other unspeakable acts…. and we don’t do public pools anymore. Also Oklahoma hates trains….. I’ve heard tell about other states where you can hop on a train and get out of state, sounds like quite a wonderful thing to be so mobile. and the conservative christian nationalism….. and do they ever hate children and minorities here…. yet they claim to be “pro life” what they are is anti woman…. I’d hate to have a daughter here.
5; I feel under seen. I’ve done a lot in my life, research, lots of experience, but the job I do has new graduates, so I’m not earning any more for my experience. It makes me want to activate my escape plan, go to the middle of nowhere and be free of all this debt because what’s the point of servicing all of it if all I get in return is being treated the same as if I hadn’t worked for the last decade?
1. My story is one of redemption and metamorphosis, I get to see it unfold as I work on myself.
2. I can talk to people in other languages, which is kinda cool.
3. I live closeby to nature. Nature is sacred to me. Rejuventaing and healing.
4. I am free from the anxiety that comes with adhering to social norms. I choose to be eccentric, and its liberating.
5. I appear to have the ability to learn things quicker than most people, as Im seeing over time now compared to my classmates.
Why it sucks:
1. The rest of the world adheres to social norms, and are cruel to those who they perceive to stick out.
2. I have a criminal record to overcome. Lots of barriers. Work, housing, university choices. Its an uphill climb.
3. I believe I have Klinefelter’s Syndrome, where your chromosomes read XXY. I need to get a caryotype (spelling?) Done.
4. I spent my 20’s using drugs and drinking. I feel 10 years behind. Im not really behind, but im not getting back those 10 years. Im sober now at least.
5. People would rather assume their impulsive speculations are correct than conform their beliefs to demonstrable evidence.
3 comments
Fun project, I’ll play; Five reasons my life and the world is great,
1;The concept of narrative
You could call it my first love, if there was no economy to shackle me I would serve the narrative and write and craft with it. Everyone has a narrative, and I have said often that humans are creatures of narrative. A narrative is a story, and we are the authors of our own stories, we trade in stories, we listen to stories, and we change the story and that is how we deal with pain in the most fundamental ways.
Probably one of my favorite shows is Jim Henson’s The Story Teller and the opening just nails it for me; “When people told themselves their past with stories, explained their present with stories, fortold their future with stories, the best place by the fire was saved for the story teller”
Which is why that’s how I see myself. Strip it all away, all the degrees, certifications, jobs, trainings, the other hats I wear, I’m a story teller. And I do tend to get the best seat by the fire. People love to hear my stories.
2. There is a justice to this world, people get what they have coming, and someone remembers everything. I had trouble placing this because it could just as well go on the other side. Yet I get the better of this more often than not.
I’m getting a good schadenfreude today as I watch another scumbag suffer their own actions backfire, it happens several times a week. I also see my actions reward me often enough that it seems like my work is worthwhile.
My work is in behavioral modification, I design rewards and so it is my job to be an artificial form of this thing. Yet, sometimes I get tired. Sometimes I have to let the universe do the thing. I have to let my collegues help, or the rest of the system do it.
So, knowing the system does do it, knowing that I’m not the ultimate backstop is a comfort I need.
3; Moving from more universal things, this one is personal; I’m well off enough, I can stop if I want to. I’ve been threatening to and if I have to I will. If I was chained to this life without escape, I’d feel a lot worse…. but I’m not, my escape is available. No one forces me to do anything. I am doing what I do because I choose it.
Yet, because I had a few public breakdowns a few years ago, everyone backed off and stopped forcing me to work jobs that forced me into complete breakdowns.
4; I’m still relatively young. 37 is young enough I can still have kids, I’m hoping it works out.
5; I have figured out what I want out of life, and apparently that’s something some people never do.
Other side, five things that are awful.
1; the economy. I’ve been working for twenty years and I really think I should have accomplished more in that time. Then there is AI which apparently is approaching appocolyptic levels, and I don’t want to talk about how I feel about IT or crypto, and there are some doom things that would help but those don’t show up
2; politics. my country is in rolling constitutional crisis, fascism, and nationalism….
3: religion….. Christianity mostly, but I have bones to pick with Scientology and a few other cults.
4; Oklahoma…… I don’t know how to explain Oklahoma to anyone not in it. We’re entering Summer in Oklahoma which should be something done to people who commit sex crimes or other unspeakable acts…. and we don’t do public pools anymore. Also Oklahoma hates trains….. I’ve heard tell about other states where you can hop on a train and get out of state, sounds like quite a wonderful thing to be so mobile. and the conservative christian nationalism….. and do they ever hate children and minorities here…. yet they claim to be “pro life” what they are is anti woman…. I’d hate to have a daughter here.
5; I feel under seen. I’ve done a lot in my life, research, lots of experience, but the job I do has new graduates, so I’m not earning any more for my experience. It makes me want to activate my escape plan, go to the middle of nowhere and be free of all this debt because what’s the point of servicing all of it if all I get in return is being treated the same as if I hadn’t worked for the last decade?
Why my life is great:
1. My story is one of redemption and metamorphosis, I get to see it unfold as I work on myself.
2. I can talk to people in other languages, which is kinda cool.
3. I live closeby to nature. Nature is sacred to me. Rejuventaing and healing.
4. I am free from the anxiety that comes with adhering to social norms. I choose to be eccentric, and its liberating.
5. I appear to have the ability to learn things quicker than most people, as Im seeing over time now compared to my classmates.
Why it sucks:
1. The rest of the world adheres to social norms, and are cruel to those who they perceive to stick out.
2. I have a criminal record to overcome. Lots of barriers. Work, housing, university choices. Its an uphill climb.
3. I believe I have Klinefelter’s Syndrome, where your chromosomes read XXY. I need to get a caryotype (spelling?) Done.
4. I spent my 20’s using drugs and drinking. I feel 10 years behind. Im not really behind, but im not getting back those 10 years. Im sober now at least.
5. People would rather assume their impulsive speculations are correct than conform their beliefs to demonstrable evidence.
Thank you both for answering.