I’m overweight, broke, and pissed off.
I can’t sleep.
I’m trying to make some kind of life for myself. What annoys me is that despite everything I’ve been trying to do, I’m still in a shit position. Tettering on homelessness and barely making it out of situations. How the hell am I supposed to get rid of the debts I have, navigate car issues, get myself back in shape, and start to work on my health overall if I can barely make my bills for the month? I’m trying to increase my monthly income and reduce my bills, but in the grand scheme of things, I mainly pay bills I need to pay anyway. Not sure what I can cut without it being dangerous (car insurance) or basically giving up (internet/cellphone service).
I’m making the most I’ve ever made in my life rn (hourly) and it’s still not enough. Fucking inflation and cost increases screwed me. Living alone is rough, but I made that choice. I have noone to turn to anymore, so I have to do things on my own. I have to learn self reliance now, otherwise I’ll be stuck past my 30’s, and at that point, noone feels sorry for you.
I’m just angry, angry I’ve gotten myself in this situation. Angry that it’s gotten this bad. The things I could control I did so damn poorly.
What am I even doing with my life at this point?
I’d sell some of the stuff I have, but I don’t even think I’d make anything back at that point. And selling some of the few things that bring me some level of joy won’t do much except bring my mood down.
I am so painfully aware that I have things good compared to a lot of people, so why am I struggling so hard? I must really be a dumbass or something, if I’m doing this badly despite trying to make things work.
6 comments
It feels like many of us face the financial equivalent of a black hole’s event horizon: a point where you’re getting sucked in faster than you can pull yourself out. In terms of black holes it’s the theoretical equivalent of being fucked. In finances there’s room for getting lucky, hitting a lottery or finding a gold brick, but for many of us it equals being fucked.
As for what you/I/we are doing wrong, I see 1 thing that surviving people do which I’m not doing. That’s getting married, or sometimes just getting a roommate to share the burden and pool your resources. I think those of us who hit life solo, thinking we can do it all by ourselves, make money, pay bills, shop for food, wash the dishes, wait for the repairman when the pipes bust, drive ourselves everywhere, not to mention bear the burden of every emotional setback alone… we’re like running a marathon on 1 leg whereas everyone else has 2.
That’s just my take on it. But really, I look at people I went to school with and see how they’re all happy and financially stable… and married. Whereas those of us who remained single are the ones struggling to make rent. Coincidence or fact of life? Either way I’m screwed because it’s too late for me to be anything but a solo act.
bc rent is the #1 killer- how can we have any savings when ALL of our money goes to rent/food/bills/etc? Married ppl have rent split in 1/2 so it makes it that much easier.
Yeah well, I had a roommate, and I had issues with ny roommate, so I had to leave and find a 1 bedroom.
It was either stay and be miserable for at least another year+, or move and really figure out my expenses, etc, proper.
I can’t room with anyone else at this point either.
Marriage? Me? With who? I can’t provide for anyone, not even myself rn. The one person I had any chance with is with someone else, and I’m not into what the modern dating sphere is rn. I’m probably better off alone anyway, since I’m damaged goods.
I can’t go back home, I can’t be homeless or stuck on the street. It’s just all so incredibly annoying.
i’m not saying you made a wrong choice- i’m just stating a fact- that rent is the #1 killer of the masses. If not for that, we COULD actually save up money, invest, eat healthier, live a more comfortable life, etc.
Yup rent is what kills us. Humans are pretty resilient, but when you face homelessness I think that’s when suicide becomes a real option. And it’s pretty fucking ridiculous isn’t it? The 3 necessities of life: food, water, shelter, and we live in a society that can’t provide those 3 simple things?
If you add the fact that we’re hard to live with, meaning roommates are out of the question, we’re really screwed. Sometimes I wonder if there’s some kinda social Darwinism here, or maybe outright Darwinism, that those who can’t get along with others of their kind must die off. So yeah society has set up an implicit rule: if you can’t get along with others you die. They make it so that rent is just a wee bit too expensive for 1 struggling person to handle alone, then hand you a noose to solve the problem :/
“and we live in a society that can’t provide those 3 simple things?”
—can’t or won’t? society refuses to provide these things bc Americans are lemmings and won’t revolt/push for change. UBI and Universal Health COULD be had, but it won’t happen in the US, not with idiots voting against even universal healthcare.
They make it so that rent is just a wee bit too expensive for 1 struggling person to handle alone, then hand you a noose to solve the problem :/”
—pffft, we don’t even get a “noose.” Well ok, we can go buy a rope, but if we actually want to commit sui—-, they make it bloody difficult (if we want to die painlessly and quickly). Why? They can’t let the peasants get out of debt that easily. Oh no. Can’t have that.