idk if anyone remembers me or not but i just wanted to post an update since my last posting.
i made an attempt about a month ago, since then i have been getting help and more therapy, as well as new medicine.
for a few weeks it was helping really well, i started showering regularly, losing weight, going to the gym, trying to get out there. i tried a fake it till you make it approach. but its not working.
i would think that after nearly a month and a half now i would start seeing improvements, but putting my past distractions behind has ended up with me having nothing i really enjoy doing. and im completley miserable.
for a while now in order to keep going to the gym the only thing keeping me going is the thought that if i dont keep going nobody will want to talk to me or be around me, its worked sofar, but i dont know how much more longer i can do it.
i feel like its all just wasted effort, and even if i did meet people i wanted to be friends or formed relationships, i would still be unhappy and miserable. i dont know what to do anymore
thanks for reading.
i also wanted to share a song i have been listening to a lot lately, it feels relatable https://youtu.be/eIfZZ1cQZss