well, im outta here! idk wen ill be back, but i hope to talk to u soon and cant wait to see all of ur guys accomplishments
whre is she?! i dont exactly remember her user, but seh has been MIA for about three or four days. oim getting concerned… please help me find her… N O O M… id appreciate u going out to Deutschland and seeing her for a bit?? u r the closest person i know…
anybody around my area?? i really need a friend right now… it would be lovely to see a face that has the same turmoils as me…. the same thoughts? or even the same ideas? anything will do… i just need u, and u need me..
hello. im back. ive been gone for over two years, i thought my life was going great! i wasa loved and loving, hoped for and hoping, cared about and caring… i am 18 now. im not the same scared little girl i thought i was before. im a confident young woman… or, thats wat the world thinks… thats wat everybody thinks, i mean… thats the point, right? i guess u could say that i am on the right track? i have a good job, i have all the right connections, i have all the correct scores when it comes to the life test. i have alot of friends too…but if i have so many friedns, why do i always feel so lonely? why do i constantly feel forgotten? forsaken? hated??? why do i always feel like imthe most annoying person on the face of this earth? why do i feel like shit all the time, 24.7…. oh yeah, thats right.. because i thought i could atually be happy.. annddd that was my first mistake. happiness isnt real, neither is true love or love at first sight. honesty isnt real, at least not in the world today. in the past two years one of my closest friends has committed suicide… my dad has gotten cancer, my fiancee has left me, my best friend has betrayed me, my friends have abandoned me, my family has forgotten me, and my life has ben nothing but turmoil and hatred. if happiness was in my vocabulary before, well… i was mistaking happiness for temporary fixes, love for lust, anger for jealousy, fury for hatred, and caring for pity… there is no such thing as HAPPY in this world, and its sad that it has taken me this long to realize it…. to all my brothers and sisters in suffering, please hear me out! it will NOT get better! it will NOT get easier. it will only get harder and harder and harder… and no matter how much you hope and pray that this life will be worth it in the end, it will NEVER be the way you want it! someday u will have to pay ur own bills, go to college, have kids, get married, and then just move through the motions of life. no matter what, we will all become pawns in thsi game of life and no matter how hard we try to stop it, it will always overpower us….
is there such a thing as a safe place? because i want to go there! somewhere the weather is always hot and the water is always cool to the touch, a place where people respect me and strangers who don’t know me love me anyways. i want to be understood, i want the world to see and know how I’m feeling. but no one understands, not even you… we are all different and i believe that no one will ever help me regain peace and happiness and i want it back so bad! i remember wat it was like being happy and laughing. i remember being with my friends and hoping the day wouldn’t end, but that was then, and this is now. now the world is a hopeless, endless pit where i have to strain to keep going. its hard enough living with a bitchy mom and a douche stepfather, the only thing i have left is my baby brother, i keep living for him, i guess he is my safe place in a sort of way. he doesn’t understand me because hes too young, but he loves me, and that’s all Ive ever wanted i guess… why do i feel so hopeless? i tried that god thing and it didn’t work, i tried that Satan thing and that didn’t work either. i tried acting happy but that made it worse… i try but i never succeed. its because i’m a failure, my life is a failure, and all hope is lost for me. the only way to get through this is to end it all, but wat if i make the wrong decision? wat if i kill myself and it ends up being the worst choice i could have ever made? but wat if i do it and it ends up being the best choice? i’m so confused right now! plz plz plz help me…
well, its been a year today since i have started feeling suicidal and depressed, i wanted to end it so bad teh other day but for some reason i want to keep holding on, i dont know y people r posting valentines day greeting on this cite, there is nothing ot love about the world or the people in the wirld, we are a hopeless and pathetic race andiÂ cant wait for the world to end on december 21st. i have a valentine but only because i didnt want to say no and hurt him. i am sad and depressed as ever… but something is keeping me going, i dont know wat it is but i hope i can figure it out before i leave this god forsaken world, its all so hopeless and i feel helpless, there is no point in living.
hey, i am 16 years old TODAY!:) happy birthday to me… but i have been really depressed latley and i am hoping that the new year will like, help me start fresh or something. i am ashlie allred, i am 16, and i am a suicide survivor… if i survived through all the shit that i had to go through, then you can too. there is hope… you just ahve to hold on long enough to find it. if you make it that far, then you can go as far as the mind can percieve. i know you can do it, just let go and let god… you’ll make it.
if you are out there, reading this letter, then you are probably as scared as i am… i want to die. so do you. lets make sure that it is quick and clean ok?
death is the best way to end it all, right? this one cite is trying to pull me out of it but i want to be free of this life that i am forced to suffer in every day, i hate this life and i want out of it… im angry and im confused, i dont know wat to do. i can scream as loud as i want, but nobody will ever hear me because they dont care. i seem like a normal person but im not, im angry and hurt. iwant to die but i dont want to die in pain, got any ideas?