i ruined an event for over 300 people at my school. the department is mad, and im only a freshman who has been here for a month. i already made everyone hate me, how am i supposed to stay in this department for 4 years? im such a fuck up. i should kill myself. im just thinking about all the times ive fucked up, i ruin everything. no one would miss me, theyd fucking celebrate. im a piece of shit. i wish i could starve to death but im fat with no self control.