Is there any oldies in here?! People from back in 2014??
My mind is spinning per usual… This time it feels like it may blow… If anyone’s up and willing to talk find me on KIK at darkestraven1218
Everyone around this fucking ***** sitting here thinking they know what’s best for me and trying to tell me how to live MY ducking life!! I just wanna get the fuck up and move as far away as I can and never fucking look back!! Tired of all the bull shit!!! Fuck this!!
Anyone know how I can get ahold of him?
Anyone ever feel like you’re only here to be the joke of everything? Feel like you’re always the one people laugh at and put down. Feel like you’re always the disappointment in everything…. Yep that’s me.. Hi, my name is fuck up.
Disgusted with society… Not just the fact that a lot of ppl are all about judging and being hypocrites but because I have a kik to talk and socialize with ppl from here and I’ve had multiple ppl txt only about sex… Get a life sick fucks!!! I swear! Ugh fed up
Does anyone here take an antipsychotic? I have some personal questions I don’t want to post here. If you can kik me at darkestraven1218 that’d be awesome thanks
I’m so fuckin sick of people telling me I havent fucking tried. So fuckin sick of people saying I don’t put my “all” into it! So fucking INCREDIBLY sick of hearing, “you have to want it.” Oh, let me get this straight. You actually think I like to live every fucking moment in misery and agony? You actually think that I love to walk the streets and feel like I fucking disgust every person and that I’m a disgrace in their eyes? I mean as if it matters right? No, they don’t fucking matter but do you know how it feels to be paranoid into thinking every god damn person is out to fuckin get you? Shut the fuck up and get out of my god damn face! Fuck you you piece of fucking shit for think that I or we (all of us) WANT to fucking be here… You should feel fucking ashamed into trying to make a person who feels like shit even more fuckin shitty.. Bravo you’ve made another fucking human even more miserable.. Do you fucking feel better about yourself now?!!?! Do you feel like you’ve accomplished this sick fucking goal that you set out to do?! Hey guys, I’m going to be a fucking dick and go out and make people fell shitty.. FUCK YOU FUCK YOU FUUUCCCKK YOUUUU!!!
To be fair I hate my self just as much as you hate me… I don’t need a fucking reminder of why I disappoint everyone and why I am nothing but trash… Treat me like the most vile disgusting creature on the face of this universe because I have no soul left. You’ve taken the last little but I didn’t even know I had… FUCK YOU!!!!
FUCK ALL OF YOU!
All my life I’ve been nothing but a coward… Too afraid to step up to an abusive man (my mothers bf)… Too afraid to tell my mother he touched me in more than one inappropriate way… Too afraid to speak to people outside of my home for fear I wouldn’t fit in or fear that I would be a disappointment to more people other than just my family… Fear… Fear when I was taken away and put into foster care.. Being a coward for not just getting the fuck out and being on my own. A coward for never telling that one person I loved the way I felt.. Fear and coward now from the one I thought would be true but now looks at me like I’m the most vile creature in existence… Fear and coward I live in everyday because I feel so emotionally disconnected from all of life… All the people and background noise that would be people talking to me.. Only my mind overrides these people.. I am disconnected and I am destroyed… Why… Why do I go on everyd
Heart wide open
I’m am the chosen
Lost and broken
So many words left unspoken
Oh how I wish I was more outspoken
I try to sleep but I’m always awoken
Nightmares, eating at my soul, an empty soulless erosion
I have nothing left, I am emotionless
Make no motions
My mind reopens
Racing thoughts it’ll soon be an explosion
Self destruct in 3……2…….1….
I hate how I overthink everything!! 10 million and one things going in circles at the speed of light in my mind… I wonder where I would be and how many things would be different if I weren’t this fucked up….
Things I tell myself on a daily basis..
They probably think you’re so stupid
They think you’re a joke
Why are you like this
Why can’t you be something the can be proud of
Why can’t you do anything right
You never fail at disappointing people
You created this whole shit fest of a life that you’re stuck in
Lay down and wither away
Don’t cry.. Do not cry
You’re such a fucking coward
You could never possibly be good enough to be likeable
You have never and will never finish anything because you fail
You will never truly be worth someone’s time
You are nothing..
Anyone here been on Effexor or Remeron? What are your experiences? Anyone care to say what they have seen most affective for bipolar, anxiety and PTSD?…
The more I try to channel them out, the more they come rushing in… End me!!! Someone put me down!! They win!! I give up…
This world has overcome me on a whole new level. This emptiness I feel just won’t leave.. It’s useless I really don’t know why I try. I should just lay here and slowly waste away. People ask if you could sit down for hours or days and think about where your life will be in 5 years or 10 years or maybe even just 2 months from now I’ll never have an answer. I can not see myself anywhere new unless it leads to death.. It’s the only way I feel I’ll find some sort of peace. The only way I’ll ever feel like I’ve finally done something “right.” I never fail to disappoint people. Every time I seem to catch a mild glimpse of hope something comes along and crushes it into pieces that are like dust.. Nothing left to put together. Where do I go from here?… My mind feels like a hurricane off shore collecting more and more strength to where eventually I self destruct and leave nothing but devastation to all who knew me or would become to know me.
I AM NOTHING !!
Will not amount to anything..
The list goes on and on
I feel so fucking ashamed that for a second foolish time I could believe it was actually worth something to someone!!! I knew from day fucking 1 when you said how you felt that it was a lie, but me being the stupid fucking ***** I am trusted and believed you.. You and all these other people are nothing but lies. That’s all everything ever is!! LIES!! I know I’m worth nothing, I knew I was never worth your time or anyone else’s.. I wish that you’d just admit it. Just once, admit that I am worthless and that I never meant a damn thing to you and I’ll never mean a fucking thing to anyone else. I wish you’d admit that you want me to be laying in a ditch rotting right now!!! Why am I so fucking stupid to believe everyone’s fucking bull shit?! I might as well rot in a ditch somewhere seeing sense I know that nothing will ever be true. It’s all lies!!!!! I hope you see this and I hope you figure out some day how you completely destroyed me for good… I was broken and in a horrid place before but now I am nothing!! Live happy..
Days are exhausting and nights drag on.. You haunt my mind and lerk in my memory. I can never seem to get you to leave. As hard as I try to wish you away i know you’ll always be haunting me.. Broken and numb empty to the core
Anyone there?.. I could reaaaalllyy use a quick chat